|
Users viewing this topic:
none
|
|
Login  | |
|
Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 12:24:24 PM
|
|
|
LoveGod_LovePeople
Posts: 9
Joined: 11/9/2008
From: Illinois
Status: offline
|
Hey all, I'm new here! My name is kristen, and i'm a sophomore in college. Now for my question,
I guess I should start with some back history - My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year now and have always loved God, but in the beginning we were both ignorant as to how Christians should date. My parents aren't christian, so they never taught me, and I think his parents just never sat down and talked to him about it. So while we loved God, we also made mistakes physically because at the time we figured since we were christians we could be in any situation and not get tempted (I know, we were dumb). We never had sex or got close to it, but still - sexual sin is sexual sin. But then just literally one day the Lord gave us both a swift kick in the butt and since then we have never put ourselves in any situation that would allow us to mess up in that area and by God's grace we haven't been struggling with it since. (It's been about two months now, isn't it amazing how God can do that?)
A little bit after we stopped struggling in that area I all of a sudden got attacked with this indescribable fear. It was so awful that once I laying in bed and couldn't even move or cry because it felt like it was pushing me into my bed. It has now subsided into more of an anxiety and worry, but it is still something I deal with nearly every day. It's this fear that God doesn't want us to be together, that we are going against his will and that I'm doing everything all wrong. And i know God doesn't make us feel fear, but he does condemn us if we are doing something wrong. The only thing is, is that I can't figure out why he would be upset about it. It is now obvious by the way we live that we make God the center of every aspect in our life. The amount we have grown in our faith is incredible, and we support each other spiritually as well as in other areas of life and treat each other extremely well. So I guess my question is how do you know if something is against God's will, and how did any of you figure out what his will was for your life? I know that this anxiety and fear isn't coming from God, so I just want to know what it is coming from so I can face it and then move on with my life.
I apologize for this being so so so long! I wasn't intending it to be that long, but I though I should explain it clearly. Thanks so much for reading.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 12:51:37 PM
|
|
|
Little_1
Posts: 1588
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: LoveGod_LovePeople
......And i know God doesn't make us feel fear, but he does condemn us if we are doing something wrong.......
Hope this helps - God does not condemn us but His Holy Spirit does convict us. The devil will however do his best to condemn us. Condemnation carries with it a sense of hopelessness whereas conviction points us from what is wrong to following what is right (the first points to death whilst the latter leads to life, i.e. if obeyed and the sin is forsaken).
It is strange that you are experiencing this terrible fear despite saying you that have both obeyed something the Lord spoke to you about concerning sexual sin.
The Scripture which comes to mind is that "perfect love casts out fear" (perfect love being God's love). However, the other thought which comes to mind is that 'partial obedience' i(i.e. compromise) is not obedience.
You say that you are both no longer putting yourselves in a position where you will be tempted sexually but could it possibly be that the Lord wants you both to sever your girlfriend / boyfriend relationship full-stop for the time being?
Without knowing you properly it is hard to tell but the Holy Spirit will reveal to you the reason for this fear if you ask Him.
_____________________________
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 1:19:46 PM
|
|
|
LoveGod_LovePeople
Posts: 9
Joined: 11/9/2008
From: Illinois
Status: offline
|
Yeah I have though about that, so I have praying about it a lot. And whenever I pray about it and allow myself to stop worrying I feel better about it. I just get worried and anxious about it still sometimes. And when I'm with him I normally feel a lot better about it too unless i allow my thoughts to take control of me.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 4:55:34 PM
|
|
|
Liveloved
Posts: 2072
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: LoveGod_LovePeople
Hey all, I'm new here! My name is kristen, and i'm a sophomore in college. Now for my question,
I guess I should start with some back history - My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year now and have always loved God, but in the beginning we were both ignorant as to how Christians should date. My parents aren't christian, so they never taught me, and I think his parents just never sat down and talked to him about it. So while we loved God, we also made mistakes physically because at the time we figured since we were christians we could be in any situation and not get tempted (I know, we were dumb). We never had sex or got close to it, but still - sexual sin is sexual sin. But then just literally one day the Lord gave us both a swift kick in the butt and since then we have never put ourselves in any situation that would allow us to mess up in that area and by God's grace we haven't been struggling with it since. (It's been about two months now, isn't it amazing how God can do that?)
A little bit after we stopped struggling in that area I all of a sudden got attacked with this indescribable fear. It was so awful that once I laying in bed and couldn't even move or cry because it felt like it was pushing me into my bed. It has now subsided into more of an anxiety and worry, but it is still something I deal with nearly every day. It's this fear that God doesn't want us to be together, that we are going against his will and that I'm doing everything all wrong. And i know God doesn't make us feel fear, but he does condemn us if we are doing something wrong. The only thing is, is that I can't figure out why he would be upset about it. It is now obvious by the way we live that we make God the center of every aspect in our life. The amount we have grown in our faith is incredible, and we support each other spiritually as well as in other areas of life and treat each other extremely well. So I guess my question is how do you know if something is against God's will, and how did any of you figure out what his will was for your life? I know that this anxiety and fear isn't coming from God, so I just want to know what it is coming from so I can face it and then move on with my life.
I apologize for this being so so so long! I wasn't intending it to be that long, but I though I should explain it clearly. Thanks so much for reading.
Dear Love,
The spirit of fear is not from God. Nor is condemnation. Sounds like you are growing closer to the Lord and as we do, the devil takes us more seriously and his growls become louder and stronger. God convicted you of your sexual sin. You have repented. You have turned away from the sin and are choosing to behave differently. Bless you. It is the enemy of your soul, satan, who will remind you and try and intimidate you and bring condemnation. Don't listen to him. Draw near to God and believe what He says and the enemy will flee. Replace the devil's lies with the truth of God.
For God has not given us a spirit of timidity (fear), but of power and love and discipline (sound judgment). II Timothy 1:7
As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgresions from us. Psalm 103:12
There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
Bless you, Liveloved
P.S. I posted without reading any other responses so if my thoughts are repetitious I am sorry.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 6:13:54 PM
|
|
|
deermousie
Posts: 1942
Joined: 9/26/2007
Status: online
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: LoveGod_LovePeople
But then just literally one day the Lord gave us both a swift kick in the butt and since then we have never put ourselves in any situation that would allow us to mess up in that area and by God's grace we haven't been struggling with it since. (It's been about two months now, isn't it amazing how God can do that?)
That is so awesome! God showed you both and you did what He said - yah!!!! God is at work and you guys are following; that's just how it should be.
quote:
So I guess my question is how do you know if something is against God's will, and how did any of you figure out what his will was for your life?
You know by comparing things in your life to God's Word, the Bible. The more you read it, the more you know, and the better decisions you can make. While you're in the learning curve, ask someone who has already read and studied a lot - your pastor is probably your best bet since he has been commissioned to care for God's lambs. Or find an older Christian who has steeped his or her life in Scripture and shows a godly life.
Use God's Word as a grid to feed your questions through. If your suppostions line up with God's Word, you're doin' it right! If they don't line up with God's Word, drop what you thought and adopt what God says. Then you will be doin' it right!
quote:
I apologize for this being so so so long! I wasn't intending it to be that long, but I though I should explain it clearly. Thanks so much for reading.
That's quite alright, Kristen. If it needs to be long to explain, then it needs to be that long.  (and wait until you see some of the books I write! People should be given Boy Scout patches just for making it through them).
And welcome to the forum - there's a lot of friendly people here who love the Lord. Pull up a chair and join right on in!
_____________________________
Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 6:26:03 PM
|
|
|
Walker311
Posts: 1341
Joined: 4/11/2005
Status: offline
|
quote:
It has now subsided into more of an anxiety and worry, but it is still something I deal with nearly every day. It's this fear that God doesn't want us to be together, that we are going against his will and that I'm doing everything all wrong.
It is very difficult to balance college, a relationship, and God. You have anxiety due to the pressure that you feel to please everyone and get an education along the way. You need some guidance in rearranging your priorities and the number one person that you should strive to please is God. Next, you education can be hijacked by a relationship gone bad or even one that is going well.
Talk to your pastor or a Christian counselor about these fears. This is a pivotal time in your life so make the best of it because the decisions that you make now can affect you for the rest of your life.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 6:34:16 PM
|
|
|
LoveGod_LovePeople
Posts: 9
Joined: 11/9/2008
From: Illinois
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Walker311
It is very difficult to balance college, a relationship, and God. You have anxiety due to the pressure that you feel to please everyone and get an education along the way. You need some guidance in rearranging your priorities and the number one person that you should strive to please is God. Next, you education can be hijacked by a relationship gone bad or even one that is going well.
Thanks a lot for the advice. The only thing is, is that the reason why I'm feeling anxious is because I want to please God in my life. I just am trying to figure out what he wants so that that can happen. But I do know that he will show me what he desires when the timing is right, so I'm just trying to be patient and not worry along the way.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/10/2008 6:55:46 PM
|
|
|
atruefaith
Posts: 320
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline
|
quote:
And i know God doesn't make us feel fear, but he does condemn us if we are doing something wrong. The only thing is, is that I can't figure out why he would be upset about it. It is now obvious by the way we live that we make God the center of every aspect in our life.
Sometimes God does use fear to steer us towards his will. There was once a Philippian jailer so fearful of the prisoners he thought had escaped in the middle of the night, that he was about to take his life in front of the jail. Once realizing that all his prisoners were in fact all accounted for he came trembling to a former Pharisee asking “What must I do to be saved?” The rest is history. The jailer was saved through faith in Jesus, God was glorified and we are encouraged whenever we come upon this passage in the Book of Acts.
_____________________________
A series of short stories depicting the Christian faith....
www.atruefaith.com
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/11/2008 1:36:02 AM
|
|
|
jaggie
Posts: 36
Joined: 11/6/2008
Status: offline
|
When I feel fearful or anxious, that is a sign that I am not trusting God enough and I'm trying to do things on my own. I would seek the assistance of a counselor who is at the least tolerant of your spirituality and also spend plenty of time resting in God through prayer.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/12/2008 10:27:22 PM
|
|
|
bravjim
Posts: 395
Joined: 10/8/2008
Status: offline
|
Sounds a little like an evil foreboding to me. A dread comes over you that causes you to doubt something that is of God. When you face one, change whatever it is you are thinking about. Are you yourself doubting your relationship with him? That could lead you to feel this way as well. Whenever you feel this, pray. Ask God to deliver you from the feeling, ask Him what it is about.
_____________________________
I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfilll the lust of the flesh.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Dealing with fear and God's will - 11/12/2008 11:21:09 PM
|
|
|
LoveGod_LovePeople
Posts: 9
Joined: 11/9/2008
From: Illinois
Status: offline
|
I just wanted to thank everyone for your advice! It has gotten much better and I'm starting to be happy and know that it is a good thing now so thank you for all your advice and kind words. God Bless!
|
|
|
|
 New Messages |
 No New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/ New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/o New Messages |
 Locked w/ New Messages |
 Locked w/o New Messages |
|
 Post New Thread
Reply to Message
Post New Poll
Submit Vote
Delete My Own Post
Delete My Own Thread
Rate Posts |
|
|
Forum Tools
Printable Version
