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My struggle today - 10/8/2008 2:19:50 PM
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Geeky1
Posts: 117
Joined: 12/5/2007
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This morning I woke up with the horrible realization that the only man (said he was a Christian, working on his walk, etc.) who has shown interest in me in the past 5 years was only interested in how I could make his financial situation better. It's been almost a year since we broke up... and during that year the truth became more and more evident that he was never honest with me (we have some mutual friends and both attend a particular ministry at church, so there has been contact up until fairly recently).
Needless to say this doesn't do much for my self esteem. For one thing, I am angry at myself for falling for his con act. But mostly right now my biggest issue is that it seems no one else has been/is interested, and that makes me feel unattractive/defective. I know God says otherwise but I am struggling with wrapping my heart and brain around that. I really don't want to spend the rest of my life alone but now I'm starting to think that is what I'm faced with, and I am trying to accept it. For the most part, I don't feel I need someone for me to be validated, but it would be nice to have someone to share this life with, who is with me because he wants to be.
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RE: My struggle today - 10/8/2008 2:24:21 PM
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jesuschick247
Posts: 2277
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*HUGS* (((Geeky))) I will be praying for you, that God will send you a wonderful man who
loves you for you! May He help you remember your worth in His eyes and that no guy could
ever love you as much as your Heavenly Father does! When you get upset or depressed, read
the Psalms, they are always comforting and helpful, they were my strength this past year as I
had to make some really tough decisions! I wish I had more to say, but I don't so I will be praying!
_____________________________
I Think I'm Outta Control!
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RE: My struggle today - 10/8/2008 7:00:11 PM
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raivyne
Posts: 862
Joined: 8/28/2008
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Don't be too down-hearted Geeky1, there are plenty of people in the same boat as you. ((geeky)) I wouldn't look at it as an assault on your personage. I don't have many guys banging on my door... I think I have a habit of scaring them off... /shrug Do your best to count your blessings and pray!
_____________________________
God grades on the cross – not on a curve
Good – God = 0
In the dark? Follow the Son!
The Power of a Simple Gift! samaritanspurse.org
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RE: My struggle today - 10/8/2008 10:54:53 PM
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Geeky1
Posts: 117
Joined: 12/5/2007
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Thank you for your kind responses
I forced myself to go for a run today at lunch and I am so glad I did. I feel much better. I know that there were lessons for me to learn and I also know that He rescued me from the potential disaster of my poor choices, so for that I have been rejoicing (for quite a while actually). I just lost sight of that this morning. I guess the next thing I need to learn is how to take those thoughts captive quicker.
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 7:49:58 AM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 2118
Joined: 12/11/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Geeky1
Thank you for your kind responses
I forced myself to go for a run today at lunch and I am so glad I did. I feel much better. I know that there were lessons for me to learn and I also know that He rescued me from the potential disaster of my poor choices, so for that I have been rejoicing (for quite a while actually). I just lost sight of that this morning. I guess the next thing I need to learn is how to take those thoughts captive quicker.
Wow, this post is almost like something I would post...from running during lunch, to being rescued from a potential disaster. Hmmm...are you sure you're not my long lost twin? I mean, I'm not geeky, but I'm a major dork, lol.
Nice to hear you're rejoicing!
_____________________________
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint....Isaiah 40: 31
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 4:34:35 PM
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Geeky1
Posts: 117
Joined: 12/5/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Wow, this post is almost like something I would post...from running during lunch, to being rescued from a potential disaster. Hmmm...are you sure you're not my long lost twin? I mean, I'm not geeky, but I'm a major dork, lol.
Nice to hear you're rejoicing!
So...
you would be the dorky twin and I would be the geeky twin? ;)
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 4:35:52 PM
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mutinywxgirl
Posts: 12885
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Geeky1
quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Wow, this post is almost like something I would post...from running during lunch, to being rescued from a potential disaster. Hmmm...are you sure you're not my long lost twin? I mean, I'm not geeky, but I'm a major dork, lol.
Nice to hear you're rejoicing!
So...
you would be the dorky twin and I would be the geeky twin? ;)
Nothing wrong with that! Geeks/dorks rule the world. 
Hope you're doing better today, geeky!
_____________________________
When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.
Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 9:18:34 PM
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OnWingsofEagles
Posts: 34
Joined: 10/8/2008
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((Geeky)) I know exactly how you feel, and was just expressing these same exact feelings to my youngest sister (who is married and hasn't been single in over 10 years). The only difference is that I haven't had any CHRISTIAN single men show any interest, it's always the non-christian men who are knocking at my door and showing any type of interest.....very frustrating! I just have to keep reminding myself that it is GOD that I need and NOT a man!!! Keep your chin up and your eyes focused on things Above!! Here are some verses that I find myself returning to a lot...I hope that they will help you through this time as well!! 
I John 5:14-15 "Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him."
John 15:7 "If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you."
James 4:2b & 3a "...Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive because you ask amiss...
James 1:2-6 "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind."
_____________________________
"I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be.
But most people are unaware that I am so much more than
what they see."
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 11:27:40 PM
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Geeky1
Posts: 117
Joined: 12/5/2007
Status: offline
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Thanks for the encouragement everyone. I guess I am in serious 'take thoughts captive' training, and I am getting better!
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RE: My struggle today - 10/9/2008 11:32:22 PM
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skreyola
Posts: 1949
Joined: 1/28/2008
From: Mars
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By the way, someone in another thread I was reading after this said something about a man and a tree, and that reminded me of this, which I think might encourage you:
Women are like apples. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The men, afraid of falling and getting hurt, get the rotten apples from the ground instead of reaching for the good ones. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're AMAZING. They just have to find the right man, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
I can't take credit for that. Someone else said it, and I can't recall who it was.
_____________________________
-- Skreyola
http://skreyola.livejournal.com/
Linux is a multiuser, modular, peer-reviewed, free operating system. Therefore, it tends to be stable, secure, and reliable.
Open Source is good stewardship!
I run Debian Linux (http://www.debian.org/)
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