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Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 5:40:19 PM
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ekserekseez
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I am visiting my sister, who although not Catholic is currently sending her son to a Catholic school (until she starts "homeschooling" soon). She told me about an interesting conversation she had with other parents at the school.
Apparently, they are concerned about the new trend of unmarried and underaged pregnant girls being viewed as "heroes" because they didn't get abortions. From what they say, if parents now accuse their teenage girls (or boys even) of having sex, all the girl has to do is claim to be pregnant, and BAM! she's a hero instead of a trollop.
In this school, they said that several girls have claimed to be pregnant when confronted with evidence of "relations." In most cases the girls aren't. A couple have waited a few weeks and then "lost" their babies, and one even told her friends that, after getting busted by her mom, she went back to her boyfriend and deliberately got pregnant!
So here's the situation they find themselves in: having teen sex and busted: bad bad bad! Pregnant unmarried teen who doesn't abort: hero and role model!
I thought this was very interesting, although I myself think it would be easier to just give them condoms.
So what I want to know is, has anyone else encountered this?
NOTE AS ORIGINAL POSTER: This is NOT a discussion about the morality/immorality of abortion. Take those to the proper thread.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 5:45:23 PM
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stellaluna
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I haven't encountered it, but I think there's far too little emphasis on adoption as an option for pregnant teens. It's like you either abort or keep...no other option...and I don't understand that. Maybe it's part of what you're talking about, though???
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 5:53:20 PM
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Consecrated2God
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For some reason I'm quite skeptical. Kind of hard to fake a pregnancy, kwim?
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 5:55:17 PM
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Sideways
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quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
I haven't encountered it, but I think there's far too little emphasis on adoption as an option for pregnant teens. It's like you either abort or keep...no other option...and I don't understand that.
Sing it sister, and it's especially bad in the Christian community, well not to abort but to keep. Here at CW I've heard adoption described as selfish (on the birth mom's part) and "the easy way out". Apparently some Christians have no sense of empathy or compassion.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 5:58:36 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
For some reason I'm quite skeptical. Kind of hard to fake a pregnancy, kwim?
I think the point is that the girls are just 'saying' that they're pg so that they won't get in trouble with their parents.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 6:00:16 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Sideways
quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
I haven't encountered it, but I think there's far too little emphasis on adoption as an option for pregnant teens. It's like you either abort or keep...no other option...and I don't understand that.
Sing it sister, and it's especially bad in the Christian community, well not to abort but to keep. Here at CW I've heard adoption described as selfish (on the birth mom's part) and "the easy way out". Apparently some Christians have no sense of empathy or compassion.
Really? Where? Adoption is the best option, imo, especially since the majority of teen moms have no idea how to be unselfish in parenting.
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If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 6:02:49 PM
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Consecrated2God
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If they are saying they are pregnant in order to not get in trouble for having sex, it's not going to work very long. Besides, if they say they are pregnant, then the parents might tell all their friends. I don't see any benefit from a teen's point of view. I am very skeptical of the claims of the OP.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 6:04:26 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
If they are saying they are pregnant in order to not get in trouble for having sex, it's not going to work very long. Besides, if they say they are pregnant, then the parents might tell all their friends. I don't see any benefit from a teen's point of view. I am very skeptical of the claims of the OP.
Teens aren't known for always thinking through their lies, lol!
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<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 7:07:01 PM
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Sideways
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quote:
ORIGINAL: clag4christ
Really? Where? Adoption is the best option, imo, especially since the majority of teen moms have no idea how to be unselfish in parenting.
I'd rather not dredge up specific posters or threads, but I have seen those exact terms to describe the birth mother here. I agree with you that adoption is ususally the best for the baby and the mom. The baby gets two loving parents who are unable to conceive, and the mom can finish her education and grow up a bit.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 8:19:26 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Sideways
quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
I haven't encountered it, but I think there's far too little emphasis on adoption as an option for pregnant teens. It's like you either abort or keep...no other option...and I don't understand that.
Sing it sister, and it's especially bad in the Christian community, well not to abort but to keep. Here at CW I've heard adoption described as selfish (on the birth mom's part) and "the easy way out". Apparently some Christians have no sense of empathy or compassion.
Well, there may be folks on CW that think giving the baby up for adoption is the selfish option, but in the christian circles I, personally run in, just about everybody sees it as the UNSELFISH option, and sees keeping the baby when they can't adequately provide for the baby as the selfish option (I didn't use a pronoun, because I don't like calling babies "its"). Sideways, I'm not denying people here on CW have said what you said they said..cause I remember it very well myself. I'm just making a point that views reflected here on these forums are often different then the greater demographic.
There is a dearly loved poster on these forums who unselfishly gave a baby up for adoption when she could not take care of him. Was it because she didn't love the child? No..it's because she had so much love for him, that she wanted the best for him. I won't identify her..I will let her do that if she chooses....although she has made the info itself quite public here, so I don't think she'll mind this post. IMO, she is a HEROINE, not a selfish person.
As to the OP, Eskeereez, I know what you're talking about..I haven't been up close and personal with such situations..but I've been the proverbial "6 degrees away from them." And, yes, even when I was a teen, it irritated me when teen moms were seen as heros, just for taking good care of their baby. I felt like, "Come on, the teens who abstain are the heros."
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/10/2008 8:23:48 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
If they are saying they are pregnant in order to not get in trouble for having sex, it's not going to work very long. Besides, if they say they are pregnant, then the parents might tell all their friends. I don't see any benefit from a teen's point of view. I am very skeptical of the claims of the OP.
Faking a pregnancy is not uncommon...there is even a name for it..I'll go look it up and then come back..Ok, I'm back..it's called pseudocyesis.
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 10/10/2008 9:08:39 PM >
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Now thank we all our God, with hearts and hands and voices, what wondrous things He's done, in whom the world rejoices.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 2:11:00 AM
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ekserekseez
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quote:
If they are saying they are pregnant in order to not get in trouble for having sex, it's not going to work very long. Besides, if they say they are pregnant, then the parents might tell all their friends. I don't see any benefit from a teen's point of view. I am very skeptical of the claims of the OP.
Edited TOS 6
AS I SAID, IN MY ORIGINAL POST, had you bothered to read it, some of these girls claim to be pregnant, and then a few weeks later "lose" their baby. Others actually then go out and get pregnant. And as other posters here have noted, teens are not known for thinking through their lies.
It's interesting to read that others have encountered this as well. I received a perceptive email, talking about the high profile news stories (Spears and Palin, for example) where an underage girl is praised for being pregnant rather than disciplined for having sex.
My parents are very religious and old fashioned, and unmarried mothers send them into an absolute uproar.
< Message edited by Kath -- 10/11/2008 10:57:19 AM >
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 9:34:57 AM
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ekserekseez
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quote:
I figured this was about Palin.
I figured it was about what my sister reported; that teen girls at my nephew's school are using false claims of pregnancy to get out of trouble. Other posters have reported the same thing.
While Palin is certainly part of this culture, it goes back way before her, at least in the celebrity-following media.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 12:21:24 PM
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zoebob
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In any circle I know a teen who got pregnant and "kept" her baby as in not aborting (either raising or adopting the baby) the baby would be viewed as more of a upright person than someone who aborted their baby. HOWEVER, they would still face consequences for the sin of premarital sex and in my church if she didn't repent of the sin and insisted on staying in a sexual relationship before being married would face church discipline.
If someone thinks that having premarital sex and getting pregnant is better than remaining pure then there is something warped with their belief system
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 12:35:30 PM
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ekserekseez
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quote:
f someone thinks that having premarital sex and getting pregnant is better than remaining pure then there is something warped with their belief system
I don't know about church discipline, but I talked to Sis again about this and she said that she knows people who buy new cars for their kids if they get "pregnant," as rewards for having the baby. She said that she knows of a case where a girl told her parents that she was pregnant but going to carry the baby to term, and her parents bought a car for the boy she had been having sex with! The girl ended up not being pregnant really.
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 1:16:11 PM
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Consecrated2God
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What did the parents do when they found out she had faked her pregnancy?
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RE: Pregnancy as the latest way out of trouble - 10/11/2008 1:45:27 PM
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ekserekseez
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quote:
What did the parents do when they found out she had faked her pregnancy?
Good question. I'll ask Sis to find out.
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I think they did it for attention and to be consoled.
