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husband reflecting on you - 9/16/2008 9:56:45 AM
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applemom
Posts: 32
Joined: 4/28/2005
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How do you deal with something your husband does that you feel reflects on you in a negative way?
Especially if it is something relatively trivial but still drives you nuts?
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/16/2008 11:44:12 AM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4289
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: applemom
How do you deal with something your husband does that you feel reflects on you in a negative way?
Especially if it is something relatively trivial but still drives you nuts?
Are you more concerned about what others think of you? Or what God thinks of this area in your spouses life?
If this is a real sin area, then pointing your spouse to God is an option IF you do it in love and not out of personal convenience.
_____________________________
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/16/2008 1:30:03 PM
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applemom
Posts: 32
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good advice r in him.
Oh for sure I am concerned about what others are thinking of me.
thats what troubles me. Ishould be more concerned with what God thinks of me. So, when something rears its ugly head I need to turn ot God, bring it to Him, and try to act in a manner that would reflect my relationship with Him.
These things range from swearing to integrity. Things I would consider just plain crude or thinking along lines I don't agree with to things that are downright illegal.
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/16/2008 1:32:21 PM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4289
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
Status: online
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The crude stuff...sounds like he needs to get around some godly men.
The illegal stuff...you should not lie for him (not sayin you are...just sayin) nor should you feel like you must make excuses for him. That's on him...not you.
Can you guys not talk about this?
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/18/2008 9:08:08 AM
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applemom
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Yes we do talk about these things. The problem is he always justifies what he does.
everyone else is, that law is stupid, that law is only for incompetents, how else do we get ahead.....
truly the illegal stuff is relatively minor but it is still happening. He will not do something, anything, just because I want him to.
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/18/2008 9:48:52 AM
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small_creation
Posts: 348
Joined: 10/30/2007
From: midwest
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quote:
ORIGINAL: applemom
How do you deal with something your husband does that you feel reflects on you in a negative way?
Especially if it is something relatively trivial but still drives you nuts?
If it's really trivial, I completely look the other way. If it's getting under my skin AND trivial, I look the other way harder.
j
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/18/2008 12:37:43 PM
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IonMoon
Posts: 914
Joined: 4/21/2005
From: The Unted State of Confusion
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If it is something that I don't like, but does not personally affect me, I ignore it.
If it is something that does affect me, I speak up.
For instance, I don't mention anything about the way he chooses to dress or if he doesn't shave- even if I think he looks like a bum.
But, he has answered phone calls for me (business, not personal) in a way that was incredibly rude and I told him to cut it out because when he answered my calls, he was representing me, and therefore should not say anything that I would not say.
He has also in the past shared information about me with people without my permission and I asked him to stop.
Tara P
_____________________________
http://www.geocities.com/hallscola67/KyliesHomemadeShopIndex.htm
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/19/2008 8:45:12 PM
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applemom
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Good advice, thank you,,
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RE: husband reflecting on you - 9/19/2008 9:03:59 PM
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manda59
Posts: 6053
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
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quote:
ORIGINAL: applemom
truly the illegal stuff is relatively minor but it is still happening.
For me the main issue would be whether what he's doing that's illegal is inside or outside of the home.
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"Once again....drum roll please! Manda is right"
doinkdom, October 2008
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but i know God knows my heart and i take comfort in that. 
Oh well... so i pray and ask GOD to help me be the best wife i can and i patiently wait for my husband's eyes to be opened to the type of music he is listening to.
