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Sc1t0r -> RE: wow (6/25/2006 1:25:08 AM)
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A Christian biker lady talked to me today at work.. she said that women actually chase men. She said women just have to learn to make men think that they were chased. I got to thinking about that. I realize that in my life, yeah I've seen that. Maybe because I pay close attention to people and the details of thier actions, I've noticed women having interest in me more than the next guy would notice that.
Perhaps that's why I've noticed that I've only had relationships with women that were interested in me first. It has bothered me to no end. Perhaps that's why the ones that I chase are not interested.. because they never were. I don't know, it's mind boggling, but I do know that I will not accept a woman that I am not interested in.
Not anymore.. I can't make that mistake again. My desire has to be for her... for you, my future wife. I must see you and know you are of a virtuous character like God's Word says in Proverbs.. that your mouth opens with Wisdom.. you will have to be my Wisdom. Be my side-kick. Be my soft place, where God is my Hightower. I must let you know that God is my source of power, not you. You are not my godess, I have my God.
The Christian biker lady also told me something else. She said to pray for you, your safety, pray over a list of attributes I desire in you (perhaps God may hand pick and deliver you based on these? :) ). She also said something quite beautiful. She asked me, "Is your mother around, still living?" I said, "Yeah." She said, "Ask her to pray the same things for your future wife."
Powerful. Romantic.
I suppose, I still do have a little bit of hope you exist. I just wish you'd hurry it up. Alot people don't understand my impatience. They seem to have patience out the yinyang. It's different for me. I need to see you so that I know all that I have gone through was not in vain. I need to touch you to know it's alright to touch, I need your touch. I have thought you were a friend that I have known for four years online and I don't know that you aren't. I have thought you were many women in the past, but that's only because my heart has been very hopeful. Hope. It's all that I have. Please be real. Please stay away from bad men. Please keep your heart pure, and broken. I am very broken and very much needing to know everything is ok. That it's alright to desire you... because you exist... because you are waiting on me.
Are you waiting on me? Will I be worth the wait? I pray so. Please let God lead your heart to me soon. I don't know how much more of these storms of worry, doubt, and fear I can take. I am only a mortal man. My heart, like the lonely lone wolf, howls and pines for you.
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