RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (Full Version)

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pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (1/27/2008 10:45:28 AM)

it's not the taking it (OPK) at a different time that worries/concerns me, and makes me not trust the results. That just makes it more likely that I could have missed it. It's the fact that it was taken immediately after sleeping for about 5 hours. They all say not to use First Morning Urine except for one brand, where it doesn't matter... but I don't have that brand.



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (1/27/2008 9:01:36 PM)

I have found that OPK's usually pick up ovulation for more than one day. Mine have been positive for two days in a row before, probably the day before ovulating and during? Could I be totally wrong though? That could just be another instance of my not being able to tell if the line is dark or not! They are frustrating.....

I was very blessed and encouraged yesterday. DH and I had dinner with a couple from our church. They are older, in their 60's/70's and they are very active in leadership. They also struggled to conceive for years and lost two pregnancies. They have two grown daughters now. They, like us, got married a little older and have quite a few years between them. DH and I are 7.5 years apart. We had so many similar stories to share about where we are in life, like struggling with singleness, getting married a little older, panicking because of your biological clock. It was like God just placed them in our life for this time to encourage us. I sometimes feel like I have no one to talk to about this struggle because I don't know anyone who has struggled with infertility, and here God brings us a couple who not only understand the struggle, but whose life situation was so similar to ours now. I really needed that and I am so thankful. It was an answer to prayer.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (1/28/2008 8:54:01 AM)

David and I married when I was 31 and he was 38... so I can relate to much of what you were saying above too. =)

From what I've read online about OPK's, they do not work the same for all women. Some women may notice a positive for 2 days, some may miss seeing a positive at all because it happens in a smaller time frame for them... in which case they recommend taking them twice a day. I've not done this yet, but I'm considering it.

Wed. is David's test.

I'm still here and still frustrated.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (1/28/2008 8:54:52 AM)

Mine say they will be positive for 2 days, which has been my experience. So i dont think you could really "miss it". I guess it COULD happen, but I'd think that it would be unlikely.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (1/28/2008 9:07:24 AM)

everything I've read has said that it is possible. It says that "many women will experiece a positive for 2 days" not that ALL women will. What I've read says that it is possible to miss it, thus why they recommended taking 2 a day if you have not seen a positive.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/1/2008 4:31:55 PM)

today is not not not not not a good day.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/1/2008 4:49:46 PM)

((hugs)) I'm there with ya sister. I found out on Tuesday that my BIL and SIL are pregnant, by accident, they've only been married a month (and are three months pregnant) Ugh..

Whats wrong? I'm here if ya need to talk.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/1/2008 4:54:05 PM)

I got some bad news today, not devastating, just not great either. I've not talked with David about it yet, since I wanted to leave him alone at work, so I didn't disrupt his work day. He gets home in about an hour, so we'll talk then.

It's just, now we need to see more doctors, for more issues, and it's all very disheartening. I'm trying to remain hopeful, but some days it's just plain hard. I've been crying off and on all day.

on the plus side, I think I see a very very faint line on my OPK stick today... which I can only hope will get darker in the next few days. I thought I saw a very very faint line yesterday, but David couldn't see it, so maybe it's just wishful thinking, but I think there's one there today too. It's hard to say.



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/1/2008 9:18:35 PM)

I'm sorry you are having a hard time pumpkin [:(].



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/4/2008 4:51:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: not_the_first

I'm sorry you are having a hard time pumpkin [:(].

thanks.

David realized the other day, all on his own accord, that we've been trying for a long time now. We're still hopeful, but it's starting to wear on me. Actually, life in general is starting to wear on me.. I need a vacation. All I want is to find some tropical beach somewhere to just soak in the sun, and play in the water, and just relax.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/4/2008 4:54:31 PM)

That would be nice. The winter weather doesnt help moods any, I know thats true for me. SOrry things are rough right now. Just know you arent alone. ((hugs))


Our current "plan" is to just relax and take it easy (no Clomid, or doctor visits) for a couple of months. I have two refills of Metformin left, so our plan is to re-evaluate when I have to call the doctor for more refills. Hopefully we will be preggers by then.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/4/2008 4:57:13 PM)

unfortunately I feel pressure from doctors too. I've been told that I can't really wait much longer, and not to dawdle, the older I get the less the chance, and the more intervention they'll have to do, with less options... AAAACCCKKKK!!!

I'm currently doing 2 Bible studies... and both have been reinforcing that God is in control. We need to give everything over to God.

*sigh*



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/5/2008 11:15:08 AM)

fooey on doctors pumpkin! I've realized that I have to let God be my decision maker, not doctors. Not that they don't provide us with medical wisdom, however they don't provide us with spritual and moral wisdom or direction. You need to do what you and your husband feel the Lord is directing you to do. If it's wait, then it's wait....no matter the consequences. If it's go forward, then God will give you a peace to do so. So many people have asked us if/when we are going to start fertility treatments, and we really just haven't felt led to do that yet. I am not against them, but just because couple A did it at this time doesn't mean that's the right time for us. It's SO important that you and your husband are in prayer over this. Children really are the LORD'S blessing, not a blessing we get to chose for ourselves.....at least that is what I'm really learning these days.



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/10/2008 2:04:54 PM)

it's kinda funny that with doing 2 separate Bible studies, listening to the children's Bible story when I'm watching them, and then church and Sunday school..... all those places seem to be revolving around a common theme right now.

Trust in God and His timing. Abide/remain in God. God can do all things, even those things we think are least likely. God is in control.

Oddly enough, all those places have touched on that topic, and have used example after example from the Bible... sometimes using the same story and expanding a different area of it. I feel like God is truly trying to speak to me, if I just listen. =) It's hard not to hear it when it's coming at me in different ways each and every day. =)

Today in Sunday school we discussed Abraham and Sara and how she was 90 years old when she had her son that God had promised the couple. They both thought that it wouldn't be, and had "given up" and he had had a child with another woman (her maidservant) because they didn't wait on God's timing. I'm not really sure what I think about how that applies to my situation, except that God will take care of me, and he will do things even if I have doubts about how and his timing.



daughter_of_faith -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/10/2008 5:30:31 PM)

(((hugs))) & prayers, Gina. That's what I found out when I did my Bible study this week too. It seems to be helping you come to terms with your struggle to conceive though. That's always a good thing!!!



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/11/2008 9:40:12 AM)

oh, I came to terms with struggling to conceive quite a while ago. If I hadn't, surely I would have driven myself crazy by now. =)

I do have a few moments/up to a day or two long sometimes when I relapse, but overall, I'm fairly well adjusted over the whole thing, and not normally "dramatic" or anything. I mean, I did just have a "bad" day or so over it, but normally it's not anywhere near that bad.

Today I'm still trying to figure out what is going on with my body. I feel very very crampy. Last night David and I were cooking dinner, and we were just finishing up the cooking when I started to feel dizzy. I went to sit down, then lay down. Then with a sudden viciousness my stomach started to really hurt. I felt nauseous and ran to the bathroom. Dinner was hot and ready, but I couldn't even look at it I felt so sick. David brought me a cola, and my wrist bands that help me with nausea, and had me lay down, and then when I felt like I could sit up, I attempted dinner. It was all going fine, then all the sudden I felt nausous again. I rather quickly decided that I was done with dinner.

So far today... I'm really tired. No fever or anything. I still have cramps... to the point where I feel like my period should start momentarily. I slept with the anti-nausea bands on my wrists. David took them off of me this morning... I had actually forgotten about them. I was ok for about 20 min. then I started to feel nauseous again. I layed down for a couple more minutes, while drinking something. Then I was ok again. I ate my breakfast and everything seems ok for the moment. I'm not sure what's up though. It's odd.

Normally once nausea sets in for me, I don't want anything to do with food at all... for a long time.



daughter_of_faith -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/11/2008 10:43:47 AM)

Gina,

Is the nausea a usual thing for you? I'm just asking because as you already know nausea is an early pregnancy symptom. You tested on Wednesday and that was BFN. Have you had a chance to test again since then?

(((hugs)))



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/11/2008 4:22:26 PM)

no, I don't really enjoy testing very much, and I'm certainly not "addicted to it" like some women around here (the website in general) are, so I figured I'd give it at least another week before testing. (from today, not from the other test) I don't know... I highly doubt it would be positive. I hate to set myself up for disappointment again.

When I was a teenager my period brought on vomitting. It was far from pleasant. I always missed school my first day of my cycle. If I went, I'd come home because I'd been vomitting.

I haven't really had that sort of thing going on since I got off the birth control pills. Occasionally I would be really nauseous with those.

I assume that it's just my body gearing up for my period, but I could be wrong, and God could certainly surprise me.



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/11/2008 10:12:46 PM)

I hate nausea, it's the worst feeling. I don't think you ever can really "come to terms" with struggling to conceive. I think it's more of a journey and each part of the journey can be different. I believe that God gives you peace about it and helps you through it because he is graceful, loving and a comfortor. I don't believe that once you "accept" that you are infertile, or having a difficult time then suddenly the hard times go away. Bad days are acceptable and likely. I've learned that they are temporary, and usually the next day (or so) is better.

I have been feeling weird the past several days too. Since Friday (which would be day 17). My chest has been really hurting and I have been cramping, and at times felt a little sick - but not really period-like cramps. I either ovulated much later than I thought (usually around day 12); or I am getting my period much earlier and these have been PMS symptoms. I'm not even going to suggest the third option. [:o]



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/12/2008 9:03:09 AM)

aww, I'm sorry that you have been feeling a bit off lately too. It's hard when you wonder, but don't want to go there.

I don't normally have cramping or anything near ovulation, but every once in a while I do. Perhaps it's just that?

What you said is basically what *I* meant by coming to terms with struggling to conceive. I've accepted that this is what God wants for this part of my life, and I know that He's in control... but every once in a while I have a real hard time with it.

Just for anyone keeping up, today is CD 51 for me. My temp went up pretty high for me today. Fertility friend still says that I ovulated (by temp interpretation, disregarding the OPK information) on last Tuesday. (my OPK never said positive, but the temps have been in the right range for indicating ovulation at that time... perhaps)



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/12/2008 9:25:05 PM)

temps going up is a good sign, right?

It's been a frustrating day. I am only on day 21 and I started spotting today and getting the usual period cramps. I was just in shock and cried all the way to work. I was not emotionally prepared for getting my period so early. I usually have to "gear up" for getting my period - get prepared for the big let down that has happened for the past 1.7 years. I also had that hope that maybe these weird symptoms (breast soreness for 4 days, naseua, etc.) were maybe signs of something else. I should have known not to get my hopes up [:(].



daughter_of_faith -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/12/2008 10:50:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: not_the_first

temps going up is a good sign, right?

It's been a frustrating day. I am only on day 21 and I started spotting today and getting the usual period cramps. I was just in shock and cried all the way to work. I was not emotionally prepared for getting my period so early. I usually have to "gear up" for getting my period - get prepared for the big let down that has happened for the past 1.7 years. I also had that hope that maybe these weird symptoms (breast soreness for 4 days, naseua, etc.) were maybe signs of something else. I should have known not to get my hopes up [:(].


Temp going up is a good sign!!!

Sorry to hear about the spotting and period cramps. There can be some pain and spotting with implantation...so it's hard to say.

(((hugs))) and prayers...



pumpkin -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/13/2008 10:39:01 PM)

well, my period is here, and with a vengence. I feel just plain awful. I'm not upset, which is good. I am however in a lot of pain, and have major cramps. Plus my stomach is awfully upset, and I'm truly exhausted. I've already had about a half hour nap, then a few minutes talking to my hubby, then another hour and a half nap. Then David had cooked dinner for us, and so I got up to eat. Now I just long for my bed.

Now comes the hard decisions though. Now that my period has started, I need to decide if I want to go the clomid route. I've been putting off that decision, but now the time is at hand, and a decision is necessary. Not making a decision is making a decision at this point... as the doctor wants to see me within the first 3 days of my period if I want to go with clomid. *sigh* Prayers would be most appreciated.



not_the_first -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/14/2008 10:45:30 PM)

praying for you.....



daughter_of_faith -> RE: *Struggling* to conceive... (2/16/2008 10:36:53 AM)

I'm a little late on this, Gina; however, I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you and your DH. We're here to support whatever decisions you make. As you said, by deciding not to do anything is a decision.

(((hugs))) and continued prayers!



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