|
Users viewing this topic:
none
|
|
Login  | |
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/6/2008 10:47:39 AM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Mrs. Noah, if you are still around, how are you and your family -- especially your father?
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/6/2008 7:11:58 PM
|
|
|
Mrs.Noah
Posts: 17
Joined: 1/30/2007
Status: offline
|
I am only able to get to a computer at the library once or twice a week as our internet service at home is on the fritz. My dad is basically starving to death, having no interest in eating. The only thing he gets out of bed to do is go to dialysis three times a week. Mom goes later this week to see another oncologist about this mass in her stomach. There have been very few calls from the church people. Her SS teacher did call and tell her the other day (after not calling for several weeks), that she was really busy getting her calendar cleared so that she could start preparing for the holidays in Nov. I thought that was kind of heartless. I want so badly to write a few folks and tell them if they want to see my dad before he dies, they need to come visit soon. Mom is worried he won't make it to the end of the month. I was hoping he'd live through their 56th wedding anniv., Thanksgiving, his 77th birthday and Christmas, but I guess that is a lot to ask for.
Thanks to anyone that is still praying. I really think that is all that is keeping him alive.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/6/2008 7:18:33 PM
|
|
|
Focusing
Posts: 6022
Status: offline
|
(((Mrs.Noah)))
Yes, you and your family are still being lifted in prayer from my heart.
_____________________________
There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/6/2008 7:32:45 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Mrs. Noah, Thank you for telling us. Prayer is what we have that we can offer, and I am praying.
Perhaps a letter from you is in order. You know, Mrs. Noah, I read your church's motto. It is hard to have to recognize it, but a lot of times, when things are in the planning stages, when high hopes have not yet been dashed with the stuff of life, it is easy to think of the people of a congregation as the people who will be there for us when we are down, but it just isn't always the case.
I know that all too well, because I saw it played out in the old church where they would sing Gaither's "You will notice we say 'brother' and 'sister' 'round here // It's because we're a family and these folks are so dear." But I watched as members aged and became ill, and the church too often lost interest. If it were not for my insisting on bringing Sunday church to one such lady, it would not have happened. And when I got kicked out, the services at that home never happened again.
I have changed Gaither's song a little:
You will notice we say 'brother' and 'sister' 'round here
It's because we're a family and these folks are so dear
When one has a problem, we all disappear . . . .
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/7/2008 12:09:57 AM
|
|
|
Liveloved
Posts: 1914
Status: offline
|
My heart grieves over situations like you have described, Mrs. Noah. It is what has become of the church. . . and it is not the true church at all. The Apostle Paul said his relationship with others in the church was that of a 'nursing mother', 'a father', having a 'fond affection', and being well pleased to impart not only the gospel but 'his very life', they being 'very dear to us.' That is the life of the church, Mrs. Noah, and we should expect nothing else.
I am sorry for your father. But I am thankful he knows Jesus. This whole situation should bring us to our knees in prayer for the church. It is caught up in keeping itself rather than nurturing people.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/9/2008 5:19:28 PM
|
|
|
Mrs.Noah
Posts: 17
Joined: 1/30/2007
Status: offline
|
A lady in the church sends me prayer bulletins occassionally. She calls me once in awhile to get updates on my folks. There are a lot of prayer requests listed. Next to my dad's name it simply says, "recovering at home," and there is no mention of my mother at all. Should I email something to the prayer line and give more details about my dad and ask them to list my mom? I don't want anyone to call, visit or send cards out of pity, but when my dad does die, I can see people possibly saying, "why didn't you let us know he was so bad off or near death." I think the emails sent to the prayer line go out to many of the church members so I would kind of be killing two birds with one stone. I would be better informing the church of how bad off dad really is and maybe some would be prompted to visit. I think it is going to be hard for me to accept kind words from people after dad is gone knowing they showed no concern during the time he was sick and wanted so badly to be cared for and loved.
Thanks again
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/9/2008 6:17:00 PM
|
|
|
Focusing
Posts: 6022
Status: offline
|
quote:
Should I email something to the prayer line and give more details about my dad and ask them to list my mom?
I think that would be a good idea.
_____________________________
There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/10/2008 1:42:20 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Mrs. Noah,
No one will ever know unless you step up and do it.
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/14/2008 7:41:51 PM
|
|
|
ffbruce
Posts: 271
Joined: 10/14/2008
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Mrs.Noah
My parents are members of a large SBC. My dad fell and broke his hip four weeks ago tomorrow. He has too many health issues for surgery so stayed in the hospital for eight days and then was moved to a nursing home. He's been there over two weeks and has yet to have the first visit from any of the four pastors. None of the men in my dad's SS class have been to visit either. My folks are very upset about this and so am I. I know pastors are very busy and do not always have time to visit, but I feel like if they can't visit then that responsibility should be given to someone else. The men in the SS class are retired, and I can't imagine what is keeping them away. Their church theme is "Building relationships with a servants heart."
Just wondering how normal this is.
Maybe this has already been said 25 times, but CALL THE PASTOR.
I'm not trying to defend anybody or anything, but there is that remote possibility that they just don't know.
Again, please forgive me if I've spoken out of line here. I have not read the whole thread, and don't intend to do so. But your family deserves the compassion and support of your church, and if they don't know yet, your church deserves to know about your family's need.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/14/2008 7:44:14 PM
|
|
|
ffbruce
Posts: 271
Joined: 10/14/2008
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Liveloved
My heart grieves over situations like you have described, Mrs. Noah. It is what has become of the church. . . and it is not the true church at all. The Apostle Paul said his relationship with others in the church was that of a 'nursing mother', 'a father', having a 'fond affection', and being well pleased to impart not only the gospel but 'his very life', they being 'very dear to us.' That is the life of the church, Mrs. Noah, and we should expect nothing else.
I am sorry for your father. But I am thankful he knows Jesus. This whole situation should bring us to our knees in prayer for the church. It is caught up in keeping itself rather than nurturing people.
Just to clarify, it is what has become of SOME churches. But I'd say it's the exception, not the norm.
I am incredibly blessed to be part of a church family where this sort of thing would NOT happen. Mrs. Noah's family would probably get sick of seeing us! 
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/14/2008 10:33:38 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Oh, ffbruce! I hope it is the exception! The fact is that for some of us, it is what we know of the church. Sad but true.
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/14/2008 10:40:18 PM
|
|
|
ffbruce
Posts: 271
Joined: 10/14/2008
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Covaan_Meshuga
Oh, ffbruce! I hope it is the exception! The fact is that for some of us, it is what we know of the church. Sad but true.
Well that stinks. It really does!
I will again say that church "leaders" need to be informed, by family, of hospital stays because, with the current HIPA Privacy Laws, we cannot find out by calling the hospital.
That said, I again find myself baffled by the thought of churches where people don't visit with the sick and hurting. It seems to be to be such a central part of the very existence of the church!
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/14/2008 10:54:36 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
FF, you should scan through and read some of the posts here. We are all baffled by it, and it happens even yet. I had many reasons to leave the church and did so, when they kicked me out for refusing to continue to take off my wedding band (long story, too long to tell), and I was contacted by one person afterward, besides my daughter and her family members and my in-laws. We initially contacted some other people but quit when only one bothered to call back and one minister threatened to sue my husband after he sent him an (oh, you won't even believe this!) email with some cute, absolutely clean jokes in it -- I read it!
They call it "family," but that is so fake.
Welcome to the board, FF. There are happier places on CW, as I am sure you have discovered!
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/17/2008 3:08:17 PM
|
|
|
Mrs.Noah
Posts: 17
Joined: 1/30/2007
Status: offline
|
Hello,
I think I mentioned that my mom was having some concerns about the return of lymphoma she had three years ago. This morning I took her for a needle biopsy on this lump in her abdomen. But after doing the scan to see where the needle needed to go, it was discovered that the lump was half the size it was last time she had a CAT scan. Was about 1 1/2 inches, now about 3/4 of an inch. The radiologist saw no need to do the biopsy, stating that if it was cancer it would be getting bigger, not smaller. The oncologist agreed. This is a huge praise, a miracle and an answer to prayer!!!
Also, on Wed., my dad went outside after dialysis to wait for Red Cross to pick him up, rolled over the curb in his wheelchair and landed face down on the cement. He was taken by ambulance to the hospital but never lost consciousness or broke anything that we know of. They checked him out and did a head scan and he checked out ok so was released later that night. He recieved a small cut over one eye but did not need stitches. His face is scraped up bruised. When I think about what could have happened I am amazed and so thankful that God was with him once again.
I did email the church prayer line Wed. am and detailed my dad's issues and said we appreciated all of the prayers, but that some calls of concern and visits offering some encouragement were also necessary. So far there has been no response to either myself or my parents.
God is good all the time!!!!!
Cheryl
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/17/2008 5:07:44 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Oh, Cheryl. You seem to continue to have a sweet attitude. When I read about your mother, I rejoiced with you! That is such good news. But when I read about your father, I just gasped. I am glad that he sustained no apparent serious injuries, but wow, he has been through enough.
Cheryl, I hope that we are all learning lessons from what you are telling us. There was a time when I did not consider old age, and now, I am near it. I pray to G-d that I have not been so lax toward the elderly, the young, the disabled. i can think of times when I could have done a lot better, but this is a new day . . . .
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/17/2008 9:44:28 PM
|
|
|
Laminin
Posts: 83
Joined: 10/12/2008
From: Omaha, NE
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Mrs.Noah
My parents are members of a large SBC. My dad fell and broke his hip four weeks ago tomorrow. He has too many health issues for surgery so stayed in the hospital for eight days and then was moved to a nursing home. He's been there over two weeks and has yet to have the first visit from any of the four pastors. None of the men in my dad's SS class have been to visit either. My folks are very upset about this and so am I. I know pastors are very busy and do not always have time to visit, but I feel like if they can't visit then that responsibility should be given to someone else. The men in the SS class are retired, and I can't imagine what is keeping them away. Their church theme is "Building relationships with a servants heart."
Just wondering how normal this is.
Unsure if 'normal' is the correct word. But I can only speak for my church, but we have an actual ministry that goes to hospitals and sits with people from our congregation that may have been visiting/admitted to the hospital. Likewise with nursing facilities/assisted livings. My Dad, is the administration Pastor at our church and makes it appoint to have at least one member of the pastorial staff visit, and pray at the very minimum with the person. I'm a firm believer in giving the benefit of the doubt; perhaps the communication ball got dropped, and when the church got word your father was in the hospital/nursing home, each assumed he had been visited when the reality of it is, he hasn't. Maybe another phone call into the church would help?
But I suppose to each church their own. Sorry to hear that you father hasn't been visited by church family, I hope by the time my post has been posted, he would've been visited by a few.
_____________________________
*´¨)
¸.·´¸.·*´¨) ¸.·*¨)
(¸.·Laminin*´¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·*
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/26/2008 10:10:25 AM
|
|
|
Mrs.Noah
Posts: 17
Joined: 1/30/2007
Status: offline
|
My dad went home to heaven Sat. morning at home. We were prepared and knew this was coming but that hasn't made it any easier. Please pray for my family as we face this very difficult time.
Thanks,
Cheryl
|
|
|
|
|
RE: This just isn't right. - 10/26/2008 1:39:21 PM
|
|
|
Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3641
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: a mother who let me live
Status: offline
|
Mrs. Noah, what can we say. May the L-rd hold all of you up in His strong and comforting arms, and may all of you who know about how the church has (not) handled this be led by His hand into knowledge that this is neither His way nor His fault. May we all learn from this. I am glad you have written, because you have done a service for us all.
_____________________________
Abiyah
"Ladies and gentlemen, there are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us, and when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses." ~~Gianna Jesson, 1977 LA, CA, saline abortion survivor
|
|
|
|
 New Messages |
 No New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/ New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/o New Messages |
 Locked w/ New Messages |
 Locked w/o New Messages |
|
 Post New Thread
Reply to Message
Post New Poll
Submit Vote
Delete My Own Post
Delete My Own Thread
Rate Posts |
|
|
Forum Tools
Printable Version
