RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?"

RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (Full Version)

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Roberta_ -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/21/2008 8:59:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: ORIGINAL: DenimDiva quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: ORIGINAL: DenimDiva I understood ya Bryan. Hi Roberta, so do you agree with Bryan / disagree? Take care If that's what works in his house, then I'm all for it. We each parent to the best of our abilities. Thnx, so I guess the ages he gives for the earrings /tattoos etc make sense to you. Take care Yes, because it's his home and he has to make the rules to suit his family.

faroukfarouk -> RE: Roberta asked: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:02:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mrs.Wifey My brother had his tongue pierced once he turned 18, and I've had my navel done twice. Neither of us were particularly rebellious when we lived at home ... So yes, I would allow my son to pierce his ears and I would even allow him to wear the HUGE guages that look horridly ridiculous. We would also allow cartilage piercings in DD[;)] For the most part we have decided that we won't forbid anything except illegal activity. Neither of us agree with dating, but at the same time we won't forbid it so that it becomes a hidden rebellion. I would much rather know my children are doing something that I don't agree with and be able to know they are safe then to have them be secretive and sneak around, lying about where they are, etc... Okay so I get what you mean about the earrings. Re. the dating, I guess that's another subject altogether, but I reckon that there are various, shall we say, levels and intensities of dating. I know a lovely Christian lady who says she would advise her son to use a condom but I struggle with that sort of advice, frankly.

doinkdom -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:06:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DenimDiva quote: ORIGINAL: doinkdom and you, along with Peculiar Lady, memaw, landabee, relady, bluestone, kohls356, mrsdash, hotsaucygma, faroukfarouk and anyone else who posted are appreciated as well. I know I forgot someone...please forgive me forgiven [:D] good golly...another one [sm=icon_smile_faint.gif] give me a peanut and call me goob

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:09:06 AM)
doinkdom, Any further thread related comment maybe? Take care, and God bless.

doinkdom -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:16:25 AM)
Well, let's see [8\|] You know I've always got a comment or opinion. I have to say that stellaluna brings up a valid point for consideration. And, I don't think it's a question of going with the flow and giving in to a cultural of rebellion. Look at history...50's Elvis freaked everybody out. 60's - well, the entire decade freaked people out. 70's - a culture of sex and drugs 80's - safe sex, drugs and more self-expression 90's - self expression replacing sex/drugs more and more so...here we are with a generation who want to express themselves "in the moment." Any consequence they will suffer for decisions made "in this moment" will not be seen by them for awhile now. My daughter got pierced ears when she was 12 - she asked for it, I said yes. Tats were not really a thing around here. However, now...she has 2 (course, she's 28 years old now). I still maintain that parents of conviction are a really good influence on their children. I guess that's about all I have to say...so [sm=icon_smile_super.gif]

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:21:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: doinkdom Well, let's see [8\|] You know I've always got a comment or opinion. I have to say that stellaluna brings up a valid point for consideration. And, I don't think it's a question of going with the flow and giving in to a cultural of rebellion. Look at history...50's Elvis freaked everybody out. 60's - well, the entire decade freaked people out. 70's - a culture of sex and drugs 80's - safe sex, drugs and more self-expression 90's - self expression replacing sex/drugs more and more so...here we are with a generation who want to express themselves "in the moment." Any consequence they will suffer for decisions made "in this moment" will not be seen by them for awhile now. My daughter got pierced ears when she was 12 - she asked for it, I said yes. Tats were not really a thing around here. However, now...she has 2 (course, she's 28 years old now). I still maintain that parents of conviction are a really good influence on their children. I guess that's about all I have to say...so [sm=icon_smile_super.gif] Well, thnx. Tats, I guess that's a subject discussing but there isn't a live thread about them now. I personally don't think that the earring thing and the condom thing are part of the same issue. Take care.

doinkdom -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:24:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk I personally don't think that the earring thing and the condom thing are part of the same issue. Take care. I agree...one has long term, life altering consequences that cannot be undone no matter what. but I suppose if the conviction is the same...well, there ya go.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:27:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: doinkdom quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk I personally don't think that the earring thing and the condom thing are part of the same issue. Take care. I agree...one has long term, life altering consequences that cannot be undone no matter what. but I suppose if the conviction is the same...well, there ya go. I guess you would be a lot more concerned about the one than about the other. Take care.

peculiar_lady2 -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 12:21:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: ORIGINAL: doinkdom quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk I personally don't think that the earring thing and the condom thing are part of the same issue. Take care. I agree...one has long term, life altering consequences that cannot be undone no matter what. but I suppose if the conviction is the same...well, there ya go. I guess you would be a lot more concerned about the one than about the other. Take care. not necessarily...depends on the heart issue behind either one...if it is one of rebellion, then rebellion is rebellion...no matter what the physical affect of that is.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 12:27:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2 quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: ORIGINAL: doinkdom quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk I personally don't think that the earring thing and the condom thing are part of the same issue. Take care. I agree...one has long term, life altering consequences that cannot be undone no matter what. but I suppose if the conviction is the same...well, there ya go. I guess you would be a lot more concerned about the one than about the other. Take care. not necessarily...depends on the heart issue behind either one...if it is one of rebellion, then rebellion is rebellion...no matter what the physical affect of that is. I see what you mean, yes. Maybe in some cases. I had a Christian colleague and she would have allowed her son to get an earring. I dont think he would have been rebelling if he got one.

Jenny-Fair -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 12:35:46 PM)
That's the point of rebellion--it is doing something you are NOT supposed to do, or not doing something you ARE supposed to do...so if she would let him and he got one, it is not rebellion. If she said no and he got one, it would be rebellion, period.

peculiar_lady2 -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 1:00:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair That's the point of rebellion--it is doing something you are NOT supposed to do, or not doing something you ARE supposed to do...so if she would let him and he got one, it is not rebellion. If she said no and he got one, it would be rebellion, period. [sm=thumbsup.gif][sm=thumbsup.gif][sm=thumbsup.gif] yup...and the Bible says that rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft...which means they are letting their heart be led not by God but by satan. THAT is the true problem....not the right and wrong of an earring or tattoo or any number of things...it's the heart issue.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 1:08:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair That's the point of rebellion--it is doing something you are NOT supposed to do, or not doing something you ARE supposed to do...so if she would let him and he got one, it is not rebellion. If she said no and he got one, it would be rebellion, period. Your boys, if under 18, would have to wait for you to let them have it done, before they could have theirs pierced, anyway, right? I think, though, that these days some boys would think it just a bit strange if a double-pierced parent won't consider letting him get even one little stud in one ear, but anyway it's entirely your call. Take care, & God bless.

Jenny-Fair -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 1:26:32 PM)
quote: Your boys, if under 18, would have to wait for you to let them have it done, before they could have theirs pierced, anyway, right? No, they could do it themselves, or forge a note, or have a friend help. quote: I think, though, that these days some boys would think it just a bit strange if a double-pierced parent won't consider letting him get even one little stud in one ear, but anyway it's entirely your call. Mine apparently don't find that strange. Of course, they know the story of my second piercings (I was 13, did not have my mother's permission, and I regret having them done), they see that I rarely even wear earrings (3 times a year?), and neither of them has any desire to have their ears pierced anyway (contrary to the pop psych theory that if you forbid something, the kids will want to do it more). Most people probably consider me a pretty strict parent. However, neither of my kids has ever been 'into' much in the way of popular stuff. Beanie Babies passed without notice, saggy jeans were rejected as being impractical and ridiculous-looking, the new skinny pants equally ridiculous, facial piercings hideous, smoking stupid, etc. So, even though I would not allow many of these things, I have never been in the position of having to put my foot down.

peculiar_lady2 -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 2:00:28 PM)
quote: I think, though, that these days some boys would think it just a bit strange if a double-pierced parent won't consider letting him get even one little stud in one ear, but anyway it's entirely your call. I really don't care what my kids may feel is unfair or strange....just because my husband got his done when he was younger (but an adult!!!) and I have mine done (double actually) doesn't mean it gives my kids permission to do it too.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:17:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2 quote: I think, though, that these days some boys would think it just a bit strange if a double-pierced parent won't consider letting him get even one little stud in one ear, but anyway it's entirely your call. I really don't care what my kids may feel is unfair or strange....just because my husband got his done when he was younger (but an adult!!!) and I have mine done (double actually) doesn't mean it gives my kids permission to do it too. No it doesn't give them permission to do it as well, you are right. Obviously one doesn't know whether they are thinking (as opposed to saying) that if Mom could have it done twice, how about me even once? But it's your call as a parent, absolutely right. Take care.

Jenny-Fair -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/22/2008 11:20:14 PM)
Hmm. As I have said before, it's pretty easy to know what your child is thinking if you have a good relationship with them and pay attention.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 6:30:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair Hmm. As I have said before, it's pretty easy to know what your child is thinking if you have a good relationship with them and pay attention. Well, clearly a boy's sense of 'natural justice' about sth, including the question of if his mom has double piercings, can he have even one in one earlobe, is going to be guided by what he may hear from parents. I guess I'm referring to any independent thoughts that he may, or may not, have. But it's the parent's call, 'natural justice' however defined, or not.

PrincessDonna -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 7:52:45 AM)
I doubt most boys would even look at their mother's ears and think anything. By the time they can express those kind of opinions, they identify much more with the men in their lives and would likely only feel a double standard if an important man in their life had an earring and they weren't allowed to. Farouk, just out of pure curiosity, do you have children of your own? No ulterior motive...just asking.

Tinkerbell_ -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:02:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna I doubt most boys would even look at their mother's ears and think anything. By the time they can express those kind of opinions, they identify much more with the men in their lives and would likely only feel a double standard if an important man in their life had an earring and they weren't allowed to. Farouk, just out of pure curiosity, do you have children of your own? No ulterior motive...just asking. This is so true. My best friend is an incredibly strong presence for the boys and he has both his ears pierced. However, again, he did it when he was of age and not sooner. He didn't do it to rebel, but as a fashion thing and we both know that eventually he'll take them out. The boys think it's cool but I told them 'no way' in no uncertain terms the issue never came up again. Does that mean it won't? shrug Doubt it. But for right now while in middle school and elementary the answer is NO.

zoebob -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:04:45 AM)
Also, just because something is appropriate for some people (adults) doesn't mean it is appropriate for everyone.

PrincessDonna -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:14:19 AM)
Also true, zoebob. My brother does a lot of things that we don't allow our kids to do, including multiple piercings. They know that just because Uncle M does it doesn't make it okay in our home. My boys (8 and 7) would be mortified to do anything to make them look or seem more like "Mom".[8D]

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:17:09 AM)
quote: My best friend is an incredibly strong presence for the boys and he has both his ears pierced. However, again, he did it when he was of age and not sooner. He didn't do it to rebel, but as a fashion thing I don't think it necessarily has to be a rebellion thing. A male cousin of mine, now about 50, was in his 30s I think when he started wearing his earring; I've not seen him and his family lately. quote: The boys think it's cool but I told them 'no way' in no uncertain terms the issue never came up again. Does that mean it won't? shrug One never knows what they might think; I guess that was my point. Mind you, our nephew - his bedroom is adjacent to ours - is the type of young person who is likely to say what he thinks we might want hear. For years he has looked to my wife like to a mother for many of the basic things in life but we know that what he says to us and what he thinks are often vastly different. We pray for him a lot, of course. It wasn't my idea to start this thread; someone on another thread suggested I should, but there does seem to be quite an exchange of views.

peculiar_lady2 -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:31:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: My best friend is an incredibly strong presence for the boys and he has both his ears pierced. However, again, he did it when he was of age and not sooner. He didn't do it to rebel, but as a fashion thing I don't think it necessarily has to be a rebellion thing. A male cousin of mine, now about 50, was in his 30s I think when he started wearing his earring; I've not seen him and his family lately. but in that instance you are talking about an adult, not an underage child and not a child living at home being supported by their parents. If there is a rebellious streak that led to it, then it's between that person and God. There could very well be something like that or an underlying rebellion that you just don't see....now or ever. The Bible says that out of the heart the mouth speaks...I don't think that stops with just the particular words that come out of our mouths, I think it is also the heart that leads to the physical appearance that we choose to show others. Eventually if there is rebellion in the heart, it will be seen on the outside or heard in the words you say or it can be manifest in so many other ways (choices we make, etc). Rebellion is rebellion....period....and the result of it is not good in any light. Now that doesn't mean that everyone that has a earring is living out their own rebellion...but on the other hand, it also doesn't mean that just because it's an adult that there is not any rebellion behind the decision.

faroukfarouk -> RE: "would you let your son pierce his ears?" (4/23/2008 8:38:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2 quote: ORIGINAL: faroukfarouk quote: My best friend is an incredibly strong presence for the boys and he has both his ears pierced. However, again, he did it when he was of age and not sooner. He didn't do it to rebel, but as a fashion thing I don't think it necessarily has to be a rebellion thing. A male cousin of mine, now about 50, was in his 30s I think when he started wearing his earring; I've not seen him and his family lately. but in that instance you are talking about an adult, not an underage child and not a child living at home being supported by their parents. If there is a rebellious streak that led to it, then it's between that person and God. There could very well be something like that or an underlying rebellion that you just don't see....now or ever. The Bible says that out of the heart the mouth speaks...I don't think that stops with just the particular words that come out of our mouths, I think it is also the heart that leads to the physical appearance that we choose to show others. Eventually if there is rebellion in the heart, it will be seen on the outside or heard in the words you say or it can be manifest in so many other ways (choices we make, etc). Rebellion is rebellion....period....and the result of it is not good in any light. Now that doesn't mean that everyone that has a earring is living out their own rebellion...but on the other hand, it also doesn't mean that just because it's an adult that there is not any rebellion behind the decision. To some extent I agree about rebellion. Of course in the Bible, the man's pierced ear was about the very opposite of rebellion: the servant who wanted to serve his master willingly always. There is even something of that symbolism in Ps. 40, where the Messianically applied 'mine ears hast thou opened' is 'digged', in Hebrew, i.e., pierced. This ties in with the obedient servant idea in Philippians 2. A hymn writer has said: 'Thus found in fashion as a man, All blameless, spotless, pure, He was obedient unto death Sin's judgment to endure.' Now that this thead is well up an running and seems to have brought various comments, there's also a poll under 'Miscellaneous' about Male earrings, fyi.

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