RE: Can we be real here? (Full Version)

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ladioffaith -> RE: Can we be real here? (4/29/2008 4:21:58 PM)

quote:

Very well-said. And since I can't star the post, I'll bookmark it instead.


[sm=icon_smile_idea.gif] I can!



CoeurdeLeon_ -> RE: Can we be real here? (4/29/2008 5:21:18 PM)

Thank you.[sm=icon_smile_blush.gif]



jlp1 -> RE: Can we be real here? (4/29/2008 6:34:24 PM)

WOW, This thread got long fast LOL, I'll be real with cha; I don't really like church or gospel music that much, I would usually wait until the singing is over with then go into church, am I bad? A lot of screaming and shouting I feel is a bit over dramatized. I love sci-fi and scary movies. I show a little cleavage sometimes, and I do sometimes use bad words and I 'm not going to make excuses. Am I bad, or better yet do I care that people might judge me because of it, nope. I realized a long time ago that it is so wrong for us to judge anyone, so I started to treat people how I wanted to be treated and if it’s not returned then that on them. Acceptance of people can make you appreciated how imperfect we are and no one is walking around with a crown of glory.[sm=sparklecrown.gif]



utilityfielder -> RE: Can we be real here? (4/30/2008 12:09:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: iwillfearnoevil

i had a pastor tell me a few months ago that Christians are known for eating their own. sure the world has less moral standards than "Christians" and is more accepting. this also means that at times the world can be more accepting/forgiving then Christians. it's not perfect or how it should be, but it is reality. most of us have probably come across Christians (or been there ourselves) who expresses shock in a condescending way either privately or gossipy over a believer's sin or perceived sin. it's a fact that how we talk to people or what we say (whether in the world or in the church) depends on lots of things from their level of spirtual growth & maturity, to gender & age, relationship role (mentor, friend, teacher), etc. situations and conversations are handled differently.



I totally agree with this. One possible reason why Christians behave that way toward their brothern is to make themselves feel better about themselves.



ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: Can we be real here? (4/30/2008 9:32:21 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: utilityfielder

quote:

ORIGINAL: iwillfearnoevil

i had a pastor tell me a few months ago that Christians are known for eating their own. sure the world has less moral standards than "Christians" and is more accepting. this also means that at times the world can be more accepting/forgiving then Christians. it's not perfect or how it should be, but it is reality. most of us have probably come across Christians (or been there ourselves) who expresses shock in a condescending way either privately or gossipy over a believer's sin or perceived sin. it's a fact that how we talk to people or what we say (whether in the world or in the church) depends on lots of things from their level of spirtual growth & maturity, to gender & age, relationship role (mentor, friend, teacher), etc. situations and conversations are handled differently.



I totally agree with this. One possible reason why Christians behave that way toward their brothern is to make themselves feel better about themselves.


BTDT. Guilty as charged. In my defense, when I realized that's what I was doing, I quit!

Another thing I did that caused me a LOT of grief was think that MY way of "doing church" was better than other ways. So I chose my church based on where I felt at home, and where I thought things were run correctly (as opposed to choosing my church by listening to God.) 4 years later I was a quivering, bleeding lump of Christian looking for a SAFE place to go to church. And trust me, I didn't care if they worshipped MY way or ran things the way I thought they ought.

I'm not saying that God would have necessarily called me to a different church the first time...I probably needed the lessons I learned at that one. But I'm certain that my "elitism" caused me to suffer much of what came my way.

besiderself



shemaromans -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 5:16:39 PM)

My pastor talked this morning about being authentic believers--about being realistic, about being joyful in Christ while at the same time not discounting our trials, about being supportive of each other instead of judgmental or critical, about allowing ourselves to go to church on Sundays without feeling like we have to smile and pretend that everything's rosy. His words brought this thread to mind...

I tend to be a smiler and giggler, even when life throws curveballs at me. Considering my pastor's words, I've been wondering today if I'm realistic enough or just a joyful spirit by nature.



John_O -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 6:30:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemaromans

My pastor talked this morning about being authentic believers--about being realistic, about being joyful in Christ while at the same time not discounting our trials, about being supportive of each other instead of judgmental or critical, about allowing ourselves to go to church on Sundays without feeling like we have to smile and pretend that everything's rosy. His words brought this thread to mind...

I tend to be a smiler and giggler, even when life throws curveballs at me. Considering my pastor's words, I've been wondering today if I'm realistic enough or just a joyful spirit by nature.


I guess if you can smile during the curve balls and be sincere about it then maybe your just joyful by nature.



gracefulgirl -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 6:57:05 PM)

I have found it in the past very hard to be an authentic person. I think it's because at that point, I didn't like me very much, so thought I needed to be perfect for others to like me. I think sometimes people are concerned about being real not necessarily for the reactions of others, but because they feel that's how God views them. What I mean by this is in light of how others treat them, they sometimes feel that's how God sees them. I know this has been true of me in the past.

Moving forward, as of today, I do the best I can to be who I am at all points. I have learned to like me as I am, foibles and all. So, I don't show all my cards, but I am as real as I can be at this point in my life. Plus I think too at some points, we are still growing into who we are in Christ and don't always know all of our true selves, so I think it's a process of becoming a genuine person. Sorry so long-winded!



devinevessel -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 7:51:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

There was some discussion on the social sites thread concerning people not feeling the freedom to be who they really are around Christians, but having that freedom around the lost.

This is a concept that is totally foreign to me. I am who I am no matter where I am.

Are you?

If not, what are some of the things that you think other Christians would get down on you for?

For the sake of this discussion no example will be taken to apply to the person raising it unless they apply it to themself

For example. I like Harry Potter movies. And most science fiction fantasy movies for that matter. Yet I know that some have a problem with those. But that still doesn't stop me from being real.

Tomorrow I'll drop in on the social sites thread and respond to some of the posts from there on this thread (unless the mods and the authors tell me I cannot). I was surprised by the number of people who felt they couldn't be real here and would love to explore that more. So I wanted to get the thread started before I turned in for the night

So, Are you real?



I don't feel like I can be real around some of my Christian friends. On some subjects I guess I tend to be liberal. For example I don't have a problem with affirmative action as long as the person who benefits is qualified, meets all of the credentials, ect. This was an actual discussion with a friend from church. I learned real quickly not to talk about certain things with my Christian friends even though I am invited to do so. Some topics are just to sticky. I also feel like I can not be real when it comes to race relations at church. The church I go to is multi-cultural and I love that but sometimes certain groups are alienated but not on purpose. People think I make a big deal about it when I mention it but I am big about making sure that everyone feels accepted. I guess I am sensitive to that because I am a person of color and in some situations I was the only person of color and know what it is like to feel excluded.

At this point I just feel like I just need to keep my mouth shut about how I feel because I don't feel like defending myself anymore or want to feel like I am bucking the system.



Focusing -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 8:35:52 PM)

Our sermon this morning brought this thread to my mind as well. The sermon was about "investing in your inner circle", and started off talking about Genesis ... yep, right from the beginning. God creating the world and after each step said "It is good".

Until He created man, and then He said "It is not good".

What was not good? For man to be alone. He wanted us to experience the fellowship and communion of being in a relationship. After all, the Godhead is the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit ... God wants us to experience relationships that are intimate.

The sermon was to help us realize the importance of being part of a small group. Why a small group? So we can BE REAL. So we can have other believers close to us, that we can open up with, others who will involve themselves in our lives ... understand what is going on with us, pray for us, call us throughout the week, ask us how we are doing ... basically, people who care.

It's easier to be real with people who genuinely care about us.



BugLady -> RE: Can we be real here? (5/18/2008 8:38:19 PM)

quote:

It's easier to be real with people who genuinely care about us.


SO very true.



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