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[Poll]
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Baby/Toddler Chat (take 3)
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| Our baby hit milestones "earlier" then expected |
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| Our baby hit milestones about the time we expected |
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| Our baby hit milestones "later" then we expected |
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Total Votes : 12
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(last vote on : 5/16/2008 6:59:50 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:14:27 AM
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Georgia-Peach
Posts: 1788
Joined: 6/2/2005
From: Georgia on my mind
Status: offline
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(((Jae))) We had an incident where someone charged to our atm/debit card. Luckily it was only $300 and it got put right back into our account. Our bank was fantastic about the whole thing.
Ladies I am really struggling with discipline and I know this is a main topic of mine lately, but you ladies are are a wealth of wisdom for me. Our youth building has a platform too and he is wanting to get on that. I spent all of last night until it was time to go to nursery removing him and telling him no. He got very mad. Hubby started helping me out and was getting very upset because Hunter started pinching and being physical with hubby. He would not pop him because he had shorts on and didn't want him going to nursery with a red mark on his leg. But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed. I really don't want to cause a debate on spanking just want personal opinions. I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet. He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.
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Chelle
<------- My Heart <3
"While we try to teach our children about life, our children teach us what life is all about."
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:19:12 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 9326
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
Status: online
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quote:
Hubby started helping me out and was getting very upset because Hunter started pinching and being physical with hubby. He would not pop him because he had shorts on and didn't want him going to nursery with a red mark on his leg. But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed. I really don't want to cause a debate on spanking just want personal opinions. I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet. He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.
When Levi gets physical like that, if we're home, I say firmly NO BITE (or hit, or pinch, or pull hair) put him in the pack n play and let him scream (he loves the p n p when he's not in trouble, hates it when he is  ). When we're out, he gets a light pop on the hand or bottom. Being that he's not my first, I don't care what anyone thinks anymore...I know I am disciplining, not abusing and some kids need to feel a bit of sting to get motivation to obey/behave. The squeezing his hand might work better for you in public. When my kids are older, I use the pinch the shoulder technique when they are not wanting to obey. Just enough to get their attention with the pain, and most people around don't have a clue, I don't think.
_____________________________
<----We love you, Mom!!!
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.
~Psalm 13:5-6~
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 8:59:18 AM
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peculiar_lady2
Posts: 11762
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: Between Hither and Yon
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: manda59
Hmmmm, just wondering if your stop-lights are what we call traffic lights? 
are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.
quote:
But, in your opinion when I child starts pinching/hitting/ or being aggressive does that warrant a popping to let them know that is not allowed.
well since you asked, yes..IMO...and in our house...that behavior does warrant our attention to their backside in some cases...not all though...depending on the age. For Hunter's age, and at home, we tend to go another route (explained below)
quote:
I am consistent with removing, telling him no, but he turns right back around and does it. I hate spanking in front of others so I haven't yet.
I suggest that if you don't want to discipline him there, then remove him to a place you can discipline him appropriately then go back when he is ready to try again.
quote:
He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.
there are very very few cases that I will spank a child that age...one is safety reasons...for instance...believe me, I don't care if you are going to call the cops on me or not, if my toddler decides to sit down in the middle of a parking lot and throw a fit because they don't want to walk or hold a hand, then they WILL get a swat...or if a toddler tries to touch a hot stove, they will get their hand swatted.
for aggressive behavior such as what you are describing...hitting, biting, head butting, hurting others....I remove them from the situation or person they are hurting...over and over if that's what it takes. Believe me, Jack is the most stubborn of ours so far, and he went through this one a few months ago. He would scream for upwards of two hours some times when he got mad and aggressive...throwing a fit cause he wanted his way. We would just have to let him scream and keep putting him on the floor over and over and over and over and OVER. I even got to the point that I wouldn't even let him come over to try to climb on my lap, I would gently push him back down to the floor with my foot, because he wasn't ready to stop hurting me yet. He had to stop screaming and stop hurting me...then he could get back on my lap. Usually we went round and round about seven or more times or him being able to get back up only to hurt me again and being put back down. Some nights I even had to wake Paul up to deal with it because he would hurt me so much (I have carpel tunnel and my wrists some nights can't take much). Anyway....it's normal for his age (and probably has a lot to do with his personality too...like I said, Jack is the worst out of all of mine so far, but really all of them have done it to some extent)
quote:
I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.
lol...it's not about getting it right, it's about finding what is right for THAT child in THAT situation!!!. Believe me, all that you are going through right now is normal for his age...he is learning that he can be independent and he is asserting and trying to figure out how far he can go. If he didn't do that then he would have no drive to be more independent...that's why God created the wonderful 2 and 3yo stages!!! They are working their way to being more on their own. By 4yo usually they are soooo different when it comes to things like this....they can do more physically (developmentally) and their brain understands more and connects things more, all because they have been allowed to find the boundaries that you set.
_____________________________
Proud Army Wife
Mom to Jake, Hannah, Emma, and Jack
Baby Boy due June 25, 2008
"God has a plan for your life...and so does everybody else." ~said by Doinkdom
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:00:05 AM
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manda59
Posts: 4841
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
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If it was my child, I'd do the "very firm hand squeeze" and say no, and keep saying it. If necessary, I'd pick my child up and remove them from the room, or at least go and stand at the back with them. I wouldn't smack (your spank) in public.
I decided, before my first child was born, to never smack any of my children in front of anyone other than my dh (not even in front of a sibling), no matter what they'd done. I personally believe that it is humiliating, and having had humiliation used on me as a child, I didn't want any of them ever to feel like that.
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"Well said, Manda"
(BlessedMamaofMany May 2008)
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:03:55 AM
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manda59
Posts: 4841
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2
are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.
The order here in the UK is Red (stop), Red and Amber (be ready to go), Green (go), then Amber (be ready to stop), Red (stop).
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"Well said, Manda"
(BlessedMamaofMany May 2008)
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:06:09 AM
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peculiar_lady2
Posts: 11762
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: Between Hither and Yon
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: manda59
quote:
ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2
are your lights like Germany where they go from green to yellow to red to yellow, or do they only do yellow before red? Over here in the states it's only before red...in Germany it was yellow before any change.
The order here in the UK is Red (stop), Red and Amber (be ready to go), Green (go), then Amber (be ready to stop), Red (stop).
cool...that's how it was in Germany, and I grew to like it a lot!!! Over here it is red to green then green to amber before turning red (but you probably already knew that since you have been here before)
_____________________________
Proud Army Wife
Mom to Jake, Hannah, Emma, and Jack
Baby Boy due June 25, 2008
"God has a plan for your life...and so does everybody else." ~said by Doinkdom
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:09:52 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 9326
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
Status: online
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I've never had anyone try to sell me anything at a light. Weird!
_____________________________
<----We love you, Mom!!!
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.
~Psalm 13:5-6~
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:17:53 AM
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peculiar_lady2
Posts: 11762
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: Between Hither and Yon
Status: offline
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LOL...me either Donna. We have however contributed to the firemen when they stand out with their boots collecting money for donation to the Jerry Lewis telethon.
oh yeah....kids talk....ummm.....my KIDS love giving to the firemen when they collect money for Jerry Lewis....lol. The first time Jake did that I remember how beaming he was for the rest of the day cause he got to touch a fireman's boot....lol. He was 3 at the time.
_____________________________
Proud Army Wife
Mom to Jake, Hannah, Emma, and Jack
Baby Boy due June 25, 2008
"God has a plan for your life...and so does everybody else." ~said by Doinkdom
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 9:46:57 AM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 4447
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
Status: offline
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quote:
Any of you been involved with a program like that? As they get older they incorporate more and more physical activity which I like. I had to laugh as I was leaving and they got started with parachute time.
We are going to hopefully do Gymboree this summer along with swim lessons. Gabby will be about 9-10 months old by that time, we would have done it sooner but it just wasn't feasible time wise.
Another neat program is Kindermusik, if we had one locally I would do that over anything else.
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Ryanne Gabriella Alexis born 8-22-07!
"No firebrands, or deadly arrows just a Springfield XD .40 with Tritium sights" Patriotism
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:01:18 AM
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firefightermama
Posts: 1064
Joined: 10/24/2006
From: Canada
Status: offline
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And the fire department has really cool tools to shatter a window! They could help out too!
Oh yeah, and boot drives gross me out...I hope they use new boots when they do that. LOL
Chase stood up in his crib for the first time this morning, he was so proud of himself when I came in!
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~yolanda~
<-- Me and my hubby
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:01:43 AM
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Sideways
Posts: 2016
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Georgia-Peach
He is though starting to pinch us or smack at us when he gets mad. Usually I just grab his hand tell him no sternly. I really am flustered when it comes to discipline and making sure I do it right.
Nathan was really biting badly yesterday, but not out of anger. I think he does it when he's tired or hungry, so I try and address those problems.
But yesterday when I was so tired I was falling asleep at the kitchen table, it was really bad. I always say "NO BITE!", and if he repeats then he gets a pop in the mouth, but yesterday I got so mad that I had to put him in his crib and walk away, or else I really might've been tempted to back hand him.
We'll both be okay, Chelle. Other children have survived first time moms before.
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:34:59 AM
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RepentanceIsRequired
Posts: 805
Joined: 9/14/2005
From: Home is where the heart is.
Status: offline
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Holy smokes this thread flies!
Jae- you are so not alone in locking the baby in the car. I did that with Zachary as a baby too. We were at like Sears talking about getting the tires changed, Ryan was out talking to the guy and I decided to get out and out of habbit I locked the doors. There Zachary was happy as a lark in the back seat.
Mary was a pro sleeper last night. She had a good four hour stretch. What is even better is that she does not need to be rocked to sleep. I put her down on her tummy and she will grunt a bit and go to sleep. It is so nice.
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--Nicole--
"Icons, incense, chant...smells and bells...served up with tested sound theology, proven faith and a generous portion of beauty...that's home cooking to a hungry soul." -- unworthyseraphim
Mary Christine born 4-4-08
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 10:52:38 AM
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3cappuccinosmom
Posts: 2582
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
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Janine--I have locked my kids in the car more than once. 
One time, I was lucky a back window was open and I stuck a piece of lumber in and unlocked the side door. The other time, I stood by the car (which was running) for 40 minutes waiting for AAA to arrive. 
I haven't shared all of the stupid things I've done. But I've done a lot. I know that sick feeling in the pit of the stomach all too well.  Stuff happens even when we have the best of intentions.
On Jadon and independence--go back and read Manda's post a couple more times. 
Babies aren't meant to be 'independent' at 2 months. He has a whole lifetime for that, and believe me, it will happen on it's own before you're ready. 
You can start weaning him to his own bed now, if you have the heart for it. But if he's a baby who needs closeness, then doing that now will be a huge stressor for the whole family. I remember insisting to myself that i was going to train Biruk to sleep in his own bed very early on. Well, he's definately been a much better sleeper than the first two, but when it came down to it, I still picked sleep for both of us over midnight hours trying to sleep-train him. I don't know about others but the sleep thing got a lot easier for me when I could safely put my babies down on their tummies. They didn't startle themselves awake so often, and I could pat them on the back.
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"Children are durable and don’t necessarily wilt under adversity, just as our children don’t necessarily thrive under luxury and comfort." Garrison Keillor
Shameless Self Promotion
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 1:32:04 PM
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Flintejae
Posts: 1895
Joined: 4/11/2005
Status: offline
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Wow, thanks ladies. All of your comments and advice made a lot of sense.
Ryanne - I had a cop WITH ME (my neighbor) so that's why I didn't do that...
Donna - I didn't break the window because I knew Jason woudl be home any minute. The guys just got into the moment, I think, and didn't listen to me and damaged the car. Jason said he fixed it and I sure hope so.
Today is a new day. A new day.
Jadon's waking - I'll post more later...
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- Janine
Our son, Jadon, was born on March 12th! Thank You, Lord, for Your Amazing Miracles!
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 1:40:34 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 4447
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
Status: offline
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quote:
Ryanne - I had a cop WITH ME (my neighbor) so that's why I didn't do that...
Did he have the little flat stick thing that you can slip inside the window to pop the lock? Our cops all carry those, which is why I still would have called.
_____________________________
Ryanne Gabriella Alexis born 8-22-07!
"No firebrands, or deadly arrows just a Springfield XD .40 with Tritium sights" Patriotism
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 1:47:32 PM
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LaurainAL
Posts: 1431
Joined: 8/13/2005
Status: offline
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On discipline: Honestly, I think it just takes perseverance. They will eventually learn. I had the same thoughts as you Chelle when my first was a baby and I thought she would never learn certain things. But, she did and all is well.
I have a question that is possibly TMI for some, so if poop bothers you don't read. How old are children usually capable of wiping themselves?
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--Support the National Sarcasm Society (Yeah, like we need your help)
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RE: Baby Chat (take 3) - 5/1/2008 1:51:04 PM
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SteelMagnolia
Posts: 2075
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: Newberg, OR
Status: online
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Around 4 I think, Laura. I can remember as far back as 4, and I don't remember my mom wiping me.
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-=|Christina|=-
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I managed to lock my baby and my dog in the car with the keys sitting on the front seat. My set of duplicate keys were in my purse... which was in the locked car. They were locked in there for over 20 minutes. I swear I thought that I was going to puke when I realized what I had done. Please tell me I'm not the only oen to do something so stupid? The car got damaged a bit prying the door back to get my keys. Jadon was sleeping at first, but then he cried and cried. I felt so helpless. He was so sweaty when he got out of there. 
