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sen10tious -> RE: Step Family (6/8/2008 8:31:24 AM)
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You’re right buckifn, a true gift is not an entitlement. However, I think the problem here is not the gift but the appearance of snubbing a stepchild. In a civilized world, people are entitled to basic courtesy. Snubbing is discourteous. The achievement of high school graduation ought to be acknowledged on the level that is appropriate to the relationship. The relationships are not equal, so the acknowledgements do not need to be equal. But that does not excuse rudeness or snubbing.
You told us your feelings were hurt, tracepr; but what about your son’s feelings? As a nearly full-grown man and high school graduate, does he even want to be acknowledged by step-grandparents? Does your bio-son refer to your husband as 'dad' or as 'my mom’s husband,' or as 'Joe' (by first name)? How does he refer to your husband’s parents? If your son doesn't consider them to be anything more to him than his mom’s husband’s relatives, give up the fantasy that they ought to act like they mean more than they do.
And go buy an etiquette book. A used one would be appropriate, I think. It should cover the rules on on gift-giving.
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