my son's marriage (Full Version)

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smrtmcs -> my son's marriage (6/7/2008 9:59:48 AM)

They were just starting college when they met. The next summer they were married. I do not know all of the details, but I want to share what I do know. It was rocky after about a year, I believe. She had some health issues, but he seemed to be helpful to her. Even to the point of doing her school work for her. Now I do not know all the details as I have said. I do know that some of the things she said or told me did not to seem to always jive. I have seen her treat my son badly, now I know my son is not perfect, I am sure he wasn't always Mr. Personality either.
A liittle over a year ago they had a big disagreement. My husband talked with them, at her request, and tried to help. My son then had a planned trip that he took. Things were better for a while after he came back. They had a daughter last year. I thought things were getting better. Then she got pregnant again. Things got worse. She seemed depressed, slept a lot and just generally seemed to do nothing. My son seemd to be doing all the caring for his daughter, while also trying to do school work. She has dropped out of school. They had another big fight, this time she threw glass bottles at him and beat him while he was holding his daughter. He called the police and made a report. They talked and thought another trip would help. BAD IDEA. after all plans were made she changed her mind and becme difficult. He went and while he was gone did something stupid. I cannot bear to put it in writing. Just something that was really irresponsible and wrong. Now they are trying to make a decision as what to do. I just had to vent and get this off my chest. I hope and pray that God will help them. If my grand daughter lwaves because her mother does I will be heartbroken. Thanks for listening and praying.



Szaftoo -> RE: my son's marriage (6/7/2008 10:05:25 AM)

I am so sorry for what you are all going through and will agree with you n prayer.



buckifn -> RE: my son's marriage (6/7/2008 12:14:54 PM)

Sounds like his wife may be suffering from depression. Do you think that is a possibility?



lastblast -> RE: my son's marriage (6/7/2008 12:51:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: buckifn

Sounds like his wife may be suffering from depression. Do you think that is a possibility?


That is the same thought I had while reading this post...........Praying that they will get help in their marriage to keep their family together----for God's Glory and for their family's long term best. Blessings.................



Hislittleone -> RE: my son's marriage (6/7/2008 1:36:34 PM)

Could she be suffering from post partum depression? From what I understand it doesn't always manifest right after the birth. It can take several months to develope. If that's the case it could explain a lot and needs to be treated by a doctor. Has she seen a doctor about all of this?

Did she throw a glass bottle at him while he was holding the baby? If so I'd be extremely concerned for the baby's safety.

However, it's good that you are aware you're son's not perfect. There are always two sides to every story. And you don't know how he treats her behind closed doors. What you have described sounds a lot like what my mother-in-law could have said about us during our early years (except for the endangering a child by throwing glass bottles at him/her part). Little did she know that her wonderful son was being physically abusive, alcoholic, emotionally/verbally abusive and neglectful. [8|] (All of that has changed now praise God. But the first years were ROUGH and I did not react well to his mistreatment.) Like I said though, his parents had no clue. He even had them convinced it was mostly my fault and that I wanted the divorce. (He divorced me and wouldn't reconsider no matter what I did/said....left me and our newborn son.) But his parents only saw what he showed them.....which wasn't the WHOLE truth. But now they are finding out what REALLY was happening back then because my dh (we are now remarried--to each other) has repented and has shared a lot with his parents. So just keep that in mind. Most of the time if a child (even an adult one) is behaving badly they don't go and tell their parents about it. Most grown adults still want their parents approval to a certain extent.



deermousie -> RE: my son's marriage (6/8/2008 2:19:28 AM)

I am praying for them and for you, dear one. May God bring victory out of this.



BibleBased -> RE: my son's marriage (6/8/2008 3:49:52 AM)

Commenting on situations is extremely differcult, especially when it is third hand and the facts aren't sure. Prayer is the best course of action i feel here, both for you and your husband and their family. As a parent of 5 sons myself - at some point you have to let go/ let them be adults. Love and God bless, BibleBased.



smrtmcs -> RE: my son's marriage (6/8/2008 6:35:48 AM)

I know that all of what you have said is true. She h as taken meds for depression before, but even then she would not always take them. He was ot holding the baby during the throwing part, but during the part where she was beating on him. She has always been a bit different and I believe has some problems. But mentioning them would be disastrous I believe. I t has always been, don't say this or that she will get mad. She is a moody person and has a bad temper. My so also has a bad temper, but I have seen it change from his teen years.I am just going to leave it in God's hands. I know most of my info is thrid hand, but I know what I see. I have a hard time believing either one of them. As someone once said there are three sides to every story, his, hers and the truth. Right now I am praying for some truth and wisdom.
Thanks.



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