RE: Why would anyone marry you? (Full Version)

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broyce1981 -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 5:36:31 PM)

Why would somebody NOT want to marry me?

I always tell myself it's probably because they have bad taste in men. [sm=icon_smile.pdn]

Sorry, I know that's a very vain thing to say. Don't take it too seriously.



9drtr -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 7:20:41 PM)

Love? Folly?

Mom always said I was "collar-ad handsome," but I doubt she was the most objective of observers.



Prairiehiker -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 7:29:39 PM)

quote:

I can cook though.


If this is what would make me a marriage material, I think I'm hopeless. I can't even boil water without burning the house down, lol!



humbleinspirit -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 7:32:03 PM)

Not sure I wanna know how that is even possible! [sm=eek.gif]



utilityfielder -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 8:28:00 PM)

Answering the first question.

If I were to get married I will commit myself to love my wife, because I believe that love is an act of the will as much as an emotion.



Elena1030 -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 8:53:35 PM)

Since each man is an individual, I'm not sure what all of them who would be interested in marrying me would deem as the common set of "Elena's assets." But I'll take a stab at it. [:D]

I'm cute, funny, passionate, expressive, good with words and communication, creative, intelligent, insightful.

And my hair is really soft! [sm=biggrin.gif] And I'm willing to grow it long for him. (Where's John_O?) [sm=wink.gif]

I am an encourager. And my husband will find me to be his greatest cheerleader and supporter.

Though I'm pretty strong willed (Dr. Dobson's The Strong-Willed Child might as well have been written about me!), I can be very teachable.

I'm a lifelong learner. I love learning new things. But I hate change --- so my hubby will have plenty of opportunity to provide stability through his character even as he strikes out and leads me with his adventuresome side.

When I'm walking closely with God, I'm sweet, patient, and a good listener.


I really like what Dawn had to say here:

quote:

ORIGINAL: joy2giv2u
I could give you a list of the reasons I think someone would want to marry me......but until a gentleman sees me through God's eyes and ask for my hand in marriage the reasons he should marry me will only be surface, based on who I am without him in my life, and prayerfully not close to the answer he will give as to the real reason he married me, after a lifetime together.


Wow... That's so apt!!! [sm=gradsmile.gif]

And... that's what I would say too.

Who knows what God will do in us individually and as a couple as He works through us and in us --- to make us Christlike in unique ways? How He will use our individual uniqueness to draw out the good that He is working in... and how He will use us as iron sharpening iron?

Think of it as the combining of two unique sets of ingredients to create a
cake of such wondrous scrumptiousness, unlike any other ever created!

It's a good thing. [sm=chef.gif] A very good thing. [sm=icon_smile_bow.gif]



sunluvingirl -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 9:00:22 PM)

I would be a quiet, encouraging and patient wife. NOT a nag[:D]! I would definitely respect and look up to my husband. I can't imagine talking about him to others in a negative way.



violinist_for_jesus -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 9:41:36 PM)

I don't think that anyone would marry me, so the question then is superflous.



JustJeannie -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 9:47:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: violinist_for_jesus

I don't think that anyone would marry me, so the question then is superflous.


I think you have plenty of time to worry about that, and I am sure you have plenty to offer. You are still developing your strengths!!![:D]



jeffnevins -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:02:19 PM)

Though I've made great strides in self-improvement the past few years, no woman is interested in dating, it seems.

I could see a woman marrying me for U.S. citizenship.



JustJeannie -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:05:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jeffnevins

Though I've made great strides in self-improvement the past few years, no woman is interested in dating, it seems.

I could see a woman marrying me for U.S. citizenship.


I'm sorry, but I seriously laughed out loud. No offense though...



humbleinspirit -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:05:51 PM)

All I thought was that would be illegal instead!



Grace-N-Mercy -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:07:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: teaspoon61

quote:

Why would anyone marry you?


I ask myself this all the time?


That was going to be my answer. [:)]



humbleinspirit -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:08:34 PM)

And I will repeat, why not?[sm=dance.gif]



Tinkerbell_ -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:19:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jeffnevins

Though I've made great strides in self-improvement the past few years, no woman is interested in dating, it seems.

I could see a woman marrying me for U.S. citizenship.

The sad part is, someone recently suggested this to me the other day. "There are plenty of men around here who would marry you...mostly for a green card, but they'd do it!"

*giggle*



joy2give2u -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:21:25 PM)

quote:

Why would somebody NOT want to marry me?

quote:

This is soooo not the question to ask someone with VERY low self esteem...LOLOLOL


As I read back through this thread I could not help but wonder why somebody would not want to marry so many of the women who post here.

I realize I only know people based on what they post but I see so much beauty in the people posting in these forums.

God's heart reflected in another can be see and felt even when limited in communication.

There are some amazingly beautiful men and women, who's unveiled faces reflect a deep desire to serve the Lord, who would be such a gift to a spouse.

Tink stated this is not a question to ask someone with a very low self esteem.......and maybe she is right......maybe the problem is we see ourselves, myself included, as not being a gift for God to give to another.

I see Tink's heart and know the man who receives her as a gift from God will be blessed in so many ways.

How many of us have the wrong mindset.......wondering why would anyone marry us......when others look at us and wonder why anyone would Not marry us.

Tink, Lisa, Ester, Jennie, Elaina, Shemaromans, and so many others.......I see, from reading the your posts here and in other threads, why a man would be attracted too and wish to marry you. I don't even know most of you yet I see so much you have to give another in marriage.

So many of the women here have such beautiful hearts........and men are fools if they do not see the beauty they have to offer.

And men the same is true with you.......I read post after post, written by men who have hearts after God's own heart. Your humor, kindness and wisdom will bless your future wife.

I wonder if one reason we are all posting in a singles thread is because for too long we have wondered why anyone would marry us instead of approaching relationships with the attitude why would anyone Not want to marry me.

Lord please open our eyes to begin to see ourselves as amazing gifts, you have chosen and wrapped, to give to our spouses.

Father change our eyes so we no longer ask why would anyone marry us but instead marvel at why someone will marry us.

Show us our value Lord

Let us see ourselves as the bride and groom you have shaped us to be and reveal to us, oh Lord, how we will bring life, love and joy into the life another.

Thank you Lord for new eyes.



violinist_for_jesus -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:28:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jeffnevins

Though I've made great strides in self-improvement the past few years, no woman is interested in dating, it seems.

I could see a woman marrying me for U.S. citizenship.

That might work.



ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 10:55:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: joy2give2u

quote:

Why would somebody NOT want to marry me?

quote:

This is soooo not the question to ask someone with VERY low self esteem...LOLOLOL


As I read back through this thread I could not help but wonder why somebody would not want to marry so many of the women who post here.

I realize I only know people based on what they post but I see so much beauty in the people posting in these forums.

God's heart reflected in another can be see and felt even when limited in communication.

There are some amazingly beautiful men and women, who's unveiled faces reflect a deep desire to serve the Lord, who would be such a gift to a spouse.

Tink stated this is not a question to ask someone with a very low self esteem.......and maybe she is right......maybe the problem is we see ourselves, myself included, as not being a gift for God to give to another.

I see Tink's heart and know the man who receives her as a gift from God will be blessed in so many ways.

How many of us have the wrong mindset.......wondering why would anyone marry us......when others look at us and wonder why anyone would Not marry us.

Tink, Lisa, Ester, Jennie, Elaina, Shemaromans, and so many others.......I see, from reading the your posts here and in other threads, why a man would be attracted too and wish to marry you. I don't even know most of you yet I see so much you have to give another in marriage.

So many of the women here have such beautiful hearts........and men are fools if they do not see the beauty they have to offer.

And men the same is true with you.......I read post after post, written by men who have hearts after God's own heart. Your humor, kindness and wisdom will bless your future wife.

I wonder if one reason we are all posting in a singles thread is because for too long we have wondered why anyone would marry us instead of approaching relationships with the attitude why would anyone Not want to marry me.
Lord please open our eyes to begin to see ourselves as amazing gifts, you have chosen and wrapped, to give to our spouses.

Father change our eyes so we no longer ask why would anyone marry us but instead marvel at why someone will marry us.

Show us our value Lord

Let us see ourselves as the bride and groom you have shaped us to be and reveal to us, oh Lord, how we will bring life, love and joy into the life another.

Thank you Lord for new eyes.


Joy, I feel the same way about the people here...so many of you are wonderful people. But I have to take issue with the bolded statement above: because there HAVE BEEN NO RELATIONSHIPS. There isn't anybody around. It's like God has me hedged in.

That's why I'm here on CW...because here I'm not the only one who just can't find a single guy in my demographic anywhere in my circles. And it's not because I haven't tried. And I'm not necessarily here on CW to find someone...I'm here to be with people who get me, who understand the joys and struggles of being a Christian single.

besiderself



utilityfielder -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 11:14:32 PM)

quote:

I'm here to be with people who get me, who understand the joys and struggles of being a Christian single.


Ditto.



BugLady -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/15/2008 11:36:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: 9drtr

Love? Folly?

Mom always said I was "collar-ad handsome," but I doubt she was the most objective of observers.


I've never heard this term. What's collar-ad handsome mean?



rgod -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/16/2008 7:52:08 AM)

These are two very interesting questions and have made me think. Thanks for starting this thread RubySparkles! I've loved reading what everyone wrote. Yes, I do think that the way in which we answer this does have a bit of reflection on our self-esteem as someone else implied. But, I also think it is part of being prepared to be married - understanding what your own strengths and weaknesses.

Why would someone marry me?
Of course, it would be because the Lord said to him, "she is your wife." I love the Lord and am serious about serving Him. I am loving and affectionate, responsible, helpful, smart, encouraging, loyal, giving, sacrificing, sensitive, diplomatic, accepting, and flexible. I'm artistic (music and writing), I like to talk, am a very good listener, can keep confidences, I like to cook, don't mind cleaning (although I'm not the most organized person in the world). Physically, I am not beautiful but I am pretty. I would make a very good wife to someone who appreciates non-traditional thinking, wants a good mother for children (it doesn't matter if I physically have the child or if they are adopted or step children, I believe that God has given me the capacity to love them all equally), needs someone to be faithful in prayer and will stand by them in ministry, and can roll with the punches. I'm also often told that I'm very sweet. And I'm pretty principled. And I will definitely love and respect my husband.

Why would someone not marry me?
Someone wouldn't marry me because the Lord told him not to. (I would hope.) I wouldn't make a good match for someone who needs a very traditional wife, someone who likes routine, someone who likes to argue a lot, someone who is very particular about a lot of things (but they can be somewhat picky and I'll be flexible about it), or someone who is really serious. Although I make people laugh sometimes, I'll forget to laugh if I'm not with someone who is humorous. I'm not very punctual - I am trying to be better with that, but you'll probably never be able to set a watch by me. I'm not super neat (I'm not dirty but have a tendency towards disorganization and it takes a lot of effort for me to keep things organized) and I hate handling finances (but I'm pretty frugal) - so if a man needed a wife to organize the home and do bookkeeping, I'm not the one. (Actually, I'm looking for a husband who can do those things - I don't mind cleaning up and putting things in their place, but I would need someone else to set up the organizational system.) The flip side of being sensitive to another person's needs is that I can be hurt a bit easily, so a person who speaks roughly to me would not be a good match for me - although I could make a good complement to someone who isn't diplomatic.



John_O -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/16/2008 8:39:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RubySparkles

What's nice about you? What do you have to offer your husband/wife? I don't mean stuff like you make a great pot roast or you tell great jokes. What is special about you?


[OK I know that you're here to keep me modest but can I please answer this one honestly? I'll try not to get big headed or anything. Please?]

It's so hard dealing with the OH sometimes.

I have been very well trained as a husband.

I am exceedingly loyal and loving. She'll never want for attention or affection.

Believe that the husband's job includes providing and protecting. That includes providing for my wife's physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual needs under the leadership of Jesus. I am to be the priest of my hosue and am answerable to God for eevrything that happens in my family. The buck stops here.

I am not jealous. I figure if she wants to be with me she will be with me and nothing I can do will force her to be with me if she doesn't want to. My job is to be so good to her that she wants to be with me.

I used to make a great pot roast but it's been so hard lately to get good pot that I've stopped doing that.

I am occasionally humerus, I am a good listener, I have a good working knowledge of anatomy (but I try to keep that at an arms length).

I am an engineer (We make rotten boyfriends but great husbands). There is almost nothing that can go wrong with the house that I cannot fix, or at least keep the conytractors honest as they fix it.

God has blessed my finances and I have almost no debt (beyond the house and boat and both of those could be paid off in less than 7 years). I am a good provider.

I am fun. I like to be active. While I'm not in the best shape (I've got about 20 pounds to lose) I'm in pretty good shape.

I love children and am very social (and well socialized)

I love the Lord and try to be a good Christian. While I'm not perfect my witness is very important to me.

I can sing. I give great back rubs.

I've been described as good looking by at least one person (the payments end in only 4 more months!!)

And of course I'm overwhelmingly humble!

(Ouch! Oh come on I asked permission. Ouch. Stop kicking me!! You said I could answer this one honestly. OK OK I'll fix it.)


Anything I may have said above that sounds good must have been a temporary delusion. In reality I'm ugly and my mommy dresses me funny.



John_O -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/16/2008 8:46:09 AM)

Excellent post 41 Joy! I agree entirely. We have some incredible people here and most sell themselves far too short.



Second part of the thread:
quote:

Why would somebody NOT want to marry me?


For the life of me I've not a clue.

Ok maybe a few small ones.

1. I have a child at home. Some people may not want an instant family
2. I'm a widower so some may feel they are competing with the late wife. (They wouldn't be but they may feel that)
3. I'm rather stubborn. (Hard to believe I know)
4. I expect a lot from myself, and from those around me.
5. Certain physical trait that is normally met with "ewwww" when mentioned in public.
6. Some may see me as too good for them.
(Ouch. Owie. Oh come on everyone knows that was a joke!!)
7. I cannot move. The Girl lost her mommy, I can't take her away from her mamaw too.



rgod -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/16/2008 8:54:06 AM)

quote:

John_O: We make rotten boyfriends but great husbands


Good post John_O. A question, why do engineers generally make rotten boyfriends?



rgod -> RE: Why would anyone marry you? (6/16/2008 8:57:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: joy2give2u

As I read back through this thread I could not help but wonder why somebody would not want to marry so many of the women who post here.

I realize I only know people based on what they post but I see so much beauty in the people posting in these forums.


This was very beautiful joy2give2u - and very true. There are such beautiful people here on the singles forum in crosswalk, and I've just arrived here. Great post.



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