I'm Devastated (Full Version)

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imit8him -> I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 4:44:33 AM)

This is my first time posting a prayer request here and I honestly need more than just prayer....I am likely going to need counseling at some point as well. I do not know of many other points in my life (perhaps only two other times) from when I've been this distraught, angry, sad, depressed, scared, and vulnerable.

I feel like I've been spiritually distracted and disconnected from God, so this is even more tough for me to deal with. It's as if I need to move closer to God, even before I can ask for His grace and love and healing. I know I need God right now more than anything. And I also know that things may not get better for me, but that I need to trust Him somehow.

I was diagnosed as having a possible disease about six months ago and the doctor said to wait on things to see if they get better ... I am severely embarassed by this disorder and do not discuss it with anyone....I even have a hard time saying it aloud as it is first a rare disease and not known to most people and secondly it is embarassing to explain (you would know what I mean't if I told you)....For now, I will not disclose the details, but if it would help somehow I will discuss it. All I know is that it is possibly the worst thing that could have happened to me from a physical and psychological standpoint. Though the physical pain is not that bad, the psychological pain is like nothing I've ever felt.

Right now, I need to see a few experts in the country to figure out what to do and how bad my situation is. I had some pretty bad symptoms about six months ago and things got slightly better and then worse (recently). Things may also continue to get worse...

I am very young and have always been in shape...played sports, worked out, and kept my body in top shape (close to professional athlete shape for many years). ....For me to have what I have, there is something so psychologically damaging right now that I cannot put it into words and have barely slept. ....I feel depressed and angry...very much suicidal at my worst. If this problem gets worse, it may affect my ability to even have or enjoy sexual relations if I were to get married. I am so dead scared that I have been broken down to the point of even wanting to cry. I feel less of a person.

I do not have a terminal illness like cancer or AIDS, etc. ,nor any kind of STD (always kept my faith in that area, so no issues), but I do have something that affects me in the one area that I cannot have ever imagined being damaged. If you are a male, this is an absolute horror (absolutely every man's worst nightmare and something you would not wish on your worst male enemy). I won't go into details right now, but you can imagine what I mean....it affects the one body part that I am scared to death of having problems with.

As the bad symptoms are starting to show up and get worse (more recently)...there may be a chance to reverse this disease still, or at least minimize the damage......this may be my only hope. I've gone through phases of getting better and getting worse and right now, I believe there is a positive sign I have this disease for the longrun. At this point, I believe treatment is going to be necessary and even then the treatment is no guarantee of anything.

Aside from being physically frightened, I feel completely broken down psychologically as a male. I am young and in my prime. For me to have this disease is so overwhelming that I have wanted to just die if I cannot get well and stay well.

I personally wish God would just give me a miracle so that I do not have to suffer. I do not want this.

-Imit



conrack50 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 7:35:27 AM)

Our Father in Heaven,
We ask for this issue with imit have immediate healing from You.
We ask that you wrap your loving arms around imit and let this help.
We ask that no matter how rare anything medical is, You Father God are our Healer & Protector.
We ask that this man be filled with hope, courage & strength.
We ask also that his faith be skyrocketed towards you.
We ask that he be now on fire for you Father God.
We give you ALL the honor,praise & glory that you so richly deserve Father.
We ask this in Jesus Name, Amen

Connie Lou



peaceofGod -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 8:31:32 AM)

Father,

We pray in the name of Jesus Christ that you move on behalf of imit8him with your solutions. Amen.



sparks505 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 9:44:29 AM)

FATHER, IN THE NAME OF JESUS, PLEASE HEAL imit8him. THANK YOU FAHTER FOR HEARING OUR PRAYERS.
AMEN



March7 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 10:16:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: conrack50

Our Father in Heaven,
We ask for this issue with imit have immediate healing from You.
We ask that you wrap your loving arms around imit and let this help.
We ask that no matter how rare anything medical is, You Father God are our Healer & Protector.
We ask that this man be filled with hope, courage & strength.
We ask also that his faith be skyrocketed towards you.
We ask that he be now on fire for you Father God.
We give you ALL the honor,praise & glory that you so richly deserve Father.
We ask this in Jesus Name, Amen

Connie Lou


Yes, Lord, and amen...in Christ Jesus.



imit8him -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 11:00:41 AM)

God thank you so much for the posts here. Even though I do not know the ultimate outcome of my situation, just the immediate hearing of others prayers has calmed my heart a little bit (though I am still very nervous). I feel a great deal of gratitude that others would pray for me and continue to ask for your help.

I, too, pray for healing in a best case scenario - one that would return my body to pre-injury/disease status. Please help my doctors to make an accurate diagnosis and give proper treatment that would heal me.

Please also help me move closer to You Lord even as I am sad, angry, scared....I feel pain all over God (not just physical, but spiritual and emotional)....and part of me does not want to draw near to you, but would rather hide away somewhere. ...Please be patient with me and help me trust you and seek your presence. It is still very hard right now.
Amen



LearningfromJob -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 11:01:45 AM)

Lord, I pray for Imit...for healing, for strength, and for comfort all of which can only come from you. I pray that he will reach out to you in this time and that you will give him a peace that you are personally handling his situation. We know you are the great physician and that you can heal this man of his disease. Amen



kyl -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/15/2008 11:08:33 AM)

Lord I lift up imit8him to you today.
Lord I pray that you will give him peace beyond measure
You know his fears,concerns and needs Lord.
I pray the you will ease his distress about this situation.
Lord I pray for physical,spiritual and emotional healing.
I pray Lord that he will find his strength and hope rooted in you alone.
Lord I pray you will help him and provide for his every need.
Be with him Lord and keep him in your loving arms.
Help him to know nothing is going to happen that you and him cant get through together.
Bless him Lord with the assurance that you are always near and love him very much.
Lord I also pray you will provide him the courage to talk to his pastor or someone he can trust.
That he may have a person {friend}to confide in and talk openly with.
Thank you Lord
In Jesus name
Amen



Keabird -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 4:14:50 AM)

Father God thank You that You are bigger than every illness or disease, no matter how big it is or how rare it is.

So we ask You Lord to do a wonderful healing on this poster. Relieve them from fear and pain Lord, and may they rejoice in what You have done for them. We ask this in Jesus name.

Amen



sparkleingsnow -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 9:25:23 AM)

Father, I join my prayer with the above prayers. Asking Father that You draw imit8him close to You and comfort him. That You heal him Father, if it is within Your will. That he can rest in the assurance that his manhood is in You. That he was made in the image of You. And that nothing can change that. That he would feel Your love and just draw close to You. Bless him dear Father. In Jesus precious name. Amen



imit8him -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 3:12:30 PM)

Thank you all so far for your pleadings with the Lord. I have a specialist appointment this Wednesday at 10:00AM. I wish I could've gotten something earlier because I still have pain. Please pray that God protects my body from now until then and that my appointment leads to accurate diagnosis and an effective treatment plan.

I continue to pray and beg that my physical status returns to completely normal with no lingering bad side-effects from the disease. Sometimes the emotional pain is so much, I have tried to force my mind on other things...it almost feels like denial or escapism, but I also know I cannot do that forever. I need strength to deal with my problem. I need to get right with and draw close to God. And I have begged for a complete reversal of my disease to be completely normal/healthy again. I don't know if that is too much to ask, but almost in a child-like way, I ask these sorts of miracles. I do contiue to hope.

Also, I have had to take time away from work duties and other duties, so I need to pray that I can get through these things with strength as well. Though it is ok for now, because I need the break anyways, I may need to just deal with it and continue to work and do other things normally, despite my medical condition. I will need strength for that. I will need strength for whatever comes.

In many ways, this has reduced me to feeling very humble and at the mercy of God. I know that's a good thing. I just wish it did not have to do with this problem.

Lord, help me to be humble in my life, to seek to follow Your ways, to turn away from sin, and to trust You in everything in my life. I feel vulnerable, scared, and anxious. Please work in my heart what You desire from me through this. Enable me to be receptive to You and have a heart of faith - one that seeks You first through all trials and struggles. Amen.

Thank you all for your words here. I do find community comfort just from literally reading people's word and writing here myself. I've never taken time in my life to even read this prayer forum or to pray for others here and yet at this very moment I see how much love and strength there is in God's Kingdom of Believers. Thank you all again.

-Imit



barbi -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 6:37:49 PM)

praying in agreement with the others



Hetyra123 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 6:59:32 PM)

I thank you Lord that I can come to you in prayer and the you will hear. I pray for imit8him for healing physically and emotionally. Lord send someone to him to walk beside him during this time. I pray that you will give him strengh and also that he will get an accurate dignosis. In Jesus name I pray Amen



thedivabrat -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 11:44:58 PM)

Lord I lift this man up to you. Wrap him in your arms and hold him close to your heart. Give him patience and a calm spirit--one of peace in knowing he is not alone. Also, be with the doctors and other medical personnel that attend him. Give them clarity and wisdom and discernment. I thank you Lord for what you will do through this man as you walk with him in this difficult time.



metallikitty -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/16/2008 11:52:27 PM)

Heavenly Father, I pray you bring healing, comfort, and restoration to your child - and give him Your vision and perspective on the situation so that Your peace reigns in his soul.



dagmarharris -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/17/2008 1:29:52 AM)

Lord, please send the right psychologist, that can help this gentleman.
I hear his pain, and ask you could help him to be free of the fear of the unknown in all this.
I ask you heal him of the pain and the deep shame. I ask you help him see you are totally in all this and will never leave him.
Send wonderful woman friends who love him in a deep way..
He sounds like a lovely man and deserves the best.
IN Jesus Name, amen



love4theLord -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/17/2008 11:34:41 PM)

AMEN, in agreement with dagmarharris' prayers....

I am still praying for you brother!
I pray your dr appt goes well tomorrow. Please let us know how things are going after that...

amen
kc



imit8him -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/18/2008 3:54:12 PM)

Hi everyone,

My heart is very grateful for your prayers. I have found an unusually strong closeness to God throughout the past two weeks of being anxious and scared and turning to Him for comfort. I know I still have a ways to go before things become more clear with my condition, but the beginning of a complete reliance on God has strengthened my heart. I have read the Bible more, prayed for others, talked to friends and family more, and basically have just focused on what is important in life to comfort me throughout all of this. (Thank God I also do not have to work, because that would be too much to handle for me right now.)

I have been very emotional in more ways than I ever have for a long time. There is something about feeling terrified and vulnerable that has made my heart seek God's presence constantly...literally minute by minute of every hour. Sometimes I cannot think of anything other than my problem, but keep bringining things back to God throughout the process. ....It's been very emotional and I have felt a great deal of His love and need for reliance on Him.

Let me give you some mixed news, but hopefully good news.

I returned from my visit today in which X-Rays were good, but not entirely conclusive. I won't go into all the details, because it may not be appropriate here, but the doctor examined me and the X-Rays and felt that my condition had not worsened into parts of the negative phase. However, the X-Rays did not show other possible problem areas and things that I mentioend I felt....Therefore, I need to wait a bit more, try some medicine, and also seek out several more opinions. I have two more scheduled doctor visits to get three total opinions.

I was very happy to hear that my condition lacked some of the more severe problematic symtoms (trust me, this was already a huge relief), but still nervous about those unknown areas. I believe the only way to completely know if there is serious problems underneath may be to do some kind of minor exploratory surgery (which is scary) or test involving needles....also an ultrasound (MUCH preferred...no pain or side effects with those) may help as well. I'm not completely sure what step(s) to take next as I need more feedback and a second and third opinion, but already I have to praise God for not having some of the more troublesome effects wtih the condition.

Again, there is still a long ways to go, because of various unknowns and the need to diagonose any other problems I might be having. Those will come with more tests and opinions, but at the very least, I do not have a couple of the more severe effects I alluded to. I am taking this step by step and moment by moment....very scared still, but with more attention to God.

Please continue to pray for me. I have a doctor's visit at 11:00AM tomorrow and also one in mid-July. I am hoping the three opinions come together to form an accurate diagnosis and decision to take the right steps from there that will lead to my good health. Most of all, I contniue to pray God grants me proper healing without negative long-term side effects.

With a grateful heart. Love. [sm=heart.gif]
-Imit



March7 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/18/2008 4:17:08 PM)

quote:

I am hoping the three opinions come together to form an accurate diagnosis and decision to take the right steps from there that will lead to my good health. Most of all, I contniue to pray God grants me proper healing without negative long-term side effects.


Lord, we thank You for Your very personal concern, care, and love for imit8him and for the way You already do enable and will continue to help imit8him to imitate You. Lord, our Savior and Friend, we pray that You will do over and beyond what is asked or thought, leading the medical personnel to make accurate decisions and plans for recovery. We pray for absolutely minimal side effects and longterm good health. More than anything, we pray for spiritual strength and peace, the kind that passes understanding and leads to that joy found only in trusting an unchanging and absolutely faithful God. Jesus Christ, may You be imit8him's complete all in all. Amen.

Psalm 63

Blessings to you...



Focusing -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/18/2008 4:18:31 PM)

(((imit8him)))

Praying ... for strength spiritually, physically and emotionally, that you feel God's hand upon you.



dontbelonghere -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/18/2008 9:30:01 PM)

Father, I pray for his body, but more than that I pray for his mind.
Amen



conrack50 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/19/2008 8:21:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focusing

(((imit8him)))

Praying ... for strength spiritually, physically and emotionally, that you feel God's hand upon you.



(((imit8him)))

I know the Lord still performs miracles and he will give you what you need.
We pray that this entire situation be healed and done in Jesus Name, Amen.


Connie Lou



kyl -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/19/2008 10:26:58 AM)

quote:

Lord, we thank You for Your very personal concern, care, and love for imit8him and for the way You already do enable and will continue to help imit8him to imitate You. Lord, our Savior and Friend, we pray that You will do over and beyond what is asked or thought, leading the medical personnel to make accurate decisions and plans for recovery. We pray for absolutely minimal side effects and longterm good health. More than anything, we pray for spiritual strength and peace, the kind that passes understanding and leads to that joy found only in trusting an unchanging and absolutely faithful God. Jesus Christ, may You be imit8him's complete all in all. Amen.


Praying in agreement
Thank You Lord for all you are doing in ima8hims life
All Glory ,Honor and praise to you Lord
Thank You Lord



dianetavegia -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/19/2008 10:38:18 AM)

Praying for you now, during your doctor's visit.

Diane



Hetyra123 -> RE: I'm Devastated (6/23/2008 7:19:07 PM)

Keep pressing and leaning towards the Lord. I will continue to pray for you



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