RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (Full Version)

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cindybode -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 1:18:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair

quote:

If there's dessert, you're welcome to a reasonable serving whether or not you ate anything else, unless you are my hypoglycemic child who really needs some protein in his system before eating something sweet

I heartily agree. And if you are MY hypoglycemic child, you already know that you will feel lousy if you do that.


Mine too. He gets migraines if his blood sugar drops too low, so he's not too eager to head down that path.



Auben -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 1:47:28 AM)

I try to have sides available so most people have something they like, but I don't make more than 1 meal (with the exception of my youngest who has special diet needs).

If someone doesn't like the meal they have to try it, they don't have to finish it. Dessert comes only to people who have eaten healthy food though (if we're having dessert).

If someone is hungry between meals they are welcome to eat any fruit or veggies.



MyMasquerade -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 7:46:53 AM)

I always cook what she ask for. Now I only have one child so that does make a difference.



3cappuccinosmom -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 1:41:34 PM)

We don't make a huge issue about food, but the understanding is, supper is what is on the table, and if you don't want to eat it, fine, but I'm not making anything else.

I'm not running a restaurant or a hotel, after all. [;)]

I do try to make foods that every likes, and have several food options on the table, but I require my kids to take at least one bite of what I serve them before they declare they don't like it. We don't have dessert on a regular basis, so that's not an issue. If we're eating out or eating at someone else's house, we're already doing something special and I will let them eat dessert even if they haven't finished their meal.



Karaboo2 -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 4:12:17 PM)

At our house, everyone likes everything (the kids actually get irate if we *don't* have liver, onions, and Brussels sprouts at least every other week). BUT ... I am NOT a short order cook ... people know at least 3 days ahead what is being cooked, so there is plenty of time to object prior to it going on the table. If they decide once I've started cooking that they don't want it ... that's fine, but I'm not cooking anything else.

Another thing we do is have a set 'serving' period ... for example, dinner will be available for 45 minutes after it is put on the table, so if the kids are arguing or something, they had better make up within those 45 minutes or they miss out (arguments are not allowed at the table) -- this has only happened once in the 3 years we've been doing it.


ETA: I will, of course, make exceptions to the preparing only one meal if they are extenuous circumstances, such as dd having a tooth extracted ... I would make up something different (soft) for her for the first couple of days.



JimboFletch -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 4:17:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way

I got the eat it now, eat it cold later, or go hungry.

I think it is a time-tested system that works.

My dad had that policy and, to this day, I do not see any sense in it. It certainly didn't make me like foods that trigger my gag reflex - and it certainly didn't make any hungry kids in India, etc. sleep any easier.

I only made my kids try something once. If they didn't like it, they were free to eat something else. They both grew up to be happy, well-balanced adults - and parents.



Mrs.X -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 4:22:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JimboFletch
I only made my kids try something once. If they didn't like it, they were free to eat something else.

[sm=thumbsup.gif]
Me too. If I make something new, I always have a back-up in the fridge like buttered noodles in the fridge for him.



bzirk -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 5:08:24 PM)

I think it depends on the kid as to whether or not I adopt the eat it or go hungry stance.

My rule is that they have to try something at least once, and if they don't like it, then they can fix their own dinner and that will be a pb&j. sandwich.It is amazing how many things they like today. LOL!!

I have one kid who hated everything and never wanted to try anything. When she was younger, she would always ask with disgust, "So what are we having for dinner?" She got in trouble more than once for that attitude. She sometimes went without food because she hated peanut butter too. It's amazing how flexible she is today. [:D] In fact, all of my kids have eaten a lot of different foods, and their palates are up for trying new foods much more than most of their peers.



RubySparkles -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 5:15:05 PM)

Interesting. There's a series on tv here called 'my child won't eat'. Featured a girl of around 8-10 who eats chocolate for breakfast lunch and dinner. Also a 3 year old who refused all solid food and drank 20 baby bottles of milk per day. Extreme I know. Preferences, or spoilt children excused with 'food phobia'?



Karaboo2 -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 7:01:39 PM)

As for the trying new foods, as I said earlier, my guys like everything they've ever tried, but when our neice comes to visit, we use our 'try-it rule' ... one decent sized bite per year of age. She is currently 6, so she must take 6 bites before saying that she doesn't like it (and not just a bite like a single pea ... at least half a kid-sized fork's worth) She usually finds out that she really likes that food, but still ends up not eating it at home, because she gets away with being psycho-picky ... when SIL finds out all that she eats at our house, her eyes bug out in amazement.



MamaPyratekk -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 8:51:40 PM)

First off let me say that the advice I'm giving isn't from experience. I'm lucky enough to have a child that will eat anything and everything (I'm talking curry, capers, and other random stuff even *I* don't eat!).

I don't believe in the "eat it or go hungry rule". Though here is the way that I've had many parents tell me that they've successfully gotten their children to eat as they should. First, never make special meals. It teaches a child that they don't have to eat what everyone else is eating but the reality is that sometimes they do because it's ridiculous to make two meals every single night. Second, make sure that you do make at least one thing that night that they like. Give them a larger portion of the thing they like and smaller portions of the things that they don't like. Explain that they only have to eat this TEENY portion of food they dislike and are allowed to eat the bigger portion (make it sound monstrous, "THIS HUGE PILE OF...") of the food the LOVE. Also, if you see that they tend to not clean their plate, be sure to start giving them smaller portions and then they can ask for more if they're still hungry.

These are the only things I know that can begin to help, good luck!!!



lindakaye -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/16/2008 10:10:16 PM)

If groceries keep going up this will be a mute point. We'll be blessed to be able to feed our kids period.



bzirk -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 12:55:10 AM)

I have had a lot of kids eat at my house over the years, and very often I've had a parent tell me, "Oh, ________ won't eat ________," and it's what I happen to be cooking. Usually what I do is ask if the kid if they've ever eaten it, and usually they say, "No, but I don't like it." Then I say, "Well just try it, and if you don't like it you don't have to eat it. I've got plenty of peanut butter." [8D] I have never had to feed them the peanut butter. Not once, and then their parents will say later, "I can't believe my child ate _____." I think sometimes kids decide they don't like things before ever trying, and sometimes I can understand this. Take squash for example. Most of the time it looks like it's already been eaten, so it's not very appealing. There are a few other things like that which can turn kids off of eating, but once they take a bite, it's a whole 'nother story. My very picky eater has long since reformed, and she quickly forgets how she was in the past and doesn't understand why some of her friends won't eat things like guacamole. Hey, that's another one that looks like it's already been eaten. That's why I didn't like it as a little kid. Oh, was I out in left field. These days I could probably OD on guac.



worthaboverubies -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 1:19:51 AM)

It's the eat it or go hungry rule at our house. If they don't eat, my kids will be ok. They will not starve or die if they miss a few meals. I refuse to cater to pickiness.

OTOH, I won't make them eat things that make them gag. It's amazing what they eat now. Shrimp, crab, caviar, salmon, veggies, salads, beef, pork and of course junk food. I could go on.

At the opposite end I know 2 kids who are overwieght and will not eat anything but fast food or junk food.

I also treat the children that visit my house the same way.



Consecrated2God -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 8:00:58 AM)

quote:

Take squash for example. Most of the time it looks like it's already been eaten, so it's not very appealing.


Lol! I never did like squash as a kid, although I ate enough of it! My mom didn't cater to pickiness at all, and as a result I can choke down just about anything. [:D] She told me that when I was adult I wouldn't have to eat anything I didn't like, and so I don't anymore.



kohls356 -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 8:37:28 AM)

I ask my children to try new dishes, they don't have to if they don't want to, and if they don't like it then they don't have to eat it. I don't make my kids eat something they don't like. I don't eat things I don't like so I am not going to make my kids eat things they don't like. I realize that just because I think something tastes wonderful doesn't mean someone else does, including my children. There are some things that just by the look of them I don't want to try so I don't make them try something if they really don't want to. I have learned that as they get older they are more willing to try things they wouldn't have when they were younger.



buckifn -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 9:11:54 AM)

We had the rule mentioned in post 1 eat it or go hungry, but with my own family we started early allowing the kids to be involved in the meal planning and grocery shopping. Allowing them to help with the food choices cut way down on the problems...but if one didn't like the main course they skipped it and had more side dishes.

In the summertime it's great to have fresh cut melon, kiwi, and other fruits available if they choose to skip a meal too.

Making food an issue does much more harm than good.



bzirk -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:14:45 PM)

I thnk that the eat it or go hungy rule is handled as pretty much a non-issue at our house. Well, they can eat peanut butter, but that's it. They have never been allowed to make it an issue beyond that. Any lip, and they're definitely is no food. We've never budged from that stance, and it's amazing how my kids got in line iwth that thinking. LOL!



Consecrated2God -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:17:16 PM)

quote:

If groceries keep going up this will be a mute point. We'll be blessed to be able to feed our kids period.


You know, that's probably one reason why we did eat everything we had as a kid. We were a large family with a low income, and if we didn't like what we were having, there really wasn't anything else to eat. My mom cooks with a lot of soy, because it's cheap. One night she ended up having to feed our kids unexpectedly (we thought we'd be back before dinner time when she was watching them) and she made soyburgers for them. My son turned his nose up at them, and informed my mother that he didn't eat soyburgers, he preferred real meat. She was not happy with him, and gave him a lesson in being grateful that she was sharing what she had with him, even though she had not expected to have to feed six extra mouths that day. He found it wasn't as bad as he thought.



WesP -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:25:55 PM)

quote:

We make one meal. We tend to give small servings so that they can finish and ask for seconds. They are not required to finish seconds. We don't really have a problem with them being picky. A few weeks ago Rebekah decided that she didn't like baby spinach. AS thought that we were mean because we made her eat it anyway (we just told her that she was going to eat it and she did). Anyway, a few days later she and her siblings are raiding the Fridge. What were they making? Pita pockets full of baby spinach and salad dressing. Rebekah even asked me for more and ran to make more. She was as excited as if I had said that she could make s'mores.

We rarely have trouble with a kid who does not want to eat dinner. Sometimes I do make things that I know that they don't care for. They usually eat it without a problem. I am not for sure why the kids are so easy about this. Maybe it is because they see the grown-ups eating things that they don't like sometimes. Maybe because it is only one meal and they know that they will eat something different next time.


Works like this in my house, too! Of course, the grandparents and me are all wonderful cooks, so there is never a reason to complain. [;)]

We do occasionally have the hated dish of greens or some such, but they know they will not die during the experience!



JimboFletch -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:32:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
You know, that's probably one reason why we did eat everything we had as a kid. We were a large family...

My wife attributes a lot of her weight problem as kid and into adulthood with her parent's clean-the-plate policy. They weren't allowed to leave the table until they had cleaned their plate and/or bowls so the eat-it-or-go hungry rule didn't apppy. (7 kids in the family - PKs)



PrincessDonna -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:35:35 PM)

I think the clean plate thing and the eat it or go hungry things are completely different. I don't make my kids eat anything. They just don't have options when it's dinner time...eat it or don't eat.



Consecrated2God -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:39:13 PM)

They are completely different rules, I agree, Donna. I don't agree with the clean-your-plate rule. That's the "go hungry" part of "eat it or go hungry".



WesP -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 4:42:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God

They are completely different rules, I agree, Donna. I don't agree with the clean-your-plate rule. That's the "go hungry" part of "eat it or go hungry".


[sm=thumbsup.gif]



bzirk -> RE: Eat It Or Go Hungry? (6/17/2008 5:07:12 PM)

They are definitely different rules.



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