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Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/21/2008 11:45:36 AM
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raspberry331
Posts: 6633
Joined: 5/7/2005
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Even the best cooks will fess up to a kitchen mishap or two, whether it's the old salt-instead-of-sugar blunder or forgetting (and burning!) a casserole in the oven. Share all of your cooking bloopers here.
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/21/2008 12:09:39 PM
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Kat_D
Posts: 3173
Joined: 9/2/2005
From: Where We Shake, Rattle & Roll!
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My kids still laugh about this one...
It was my daughters 5th birthday and we were planning a big birthday BBQ for her for about 50 people. When I asked what kind of a cake she wanted, she asked me to make a homemade white cake with strawberries and whipped cream.
I worked all morning on the day of the party, baking the cake from scratch. I had to quadruple the recipe and the cake was huge...I didn't have a platter large enough for it, so I glued about 5 sheets of very heavy cardboard together for a makeshift platter and covered it with foil. I got the cake onto the "platter" and finished covering it in the strawberries and whipped cream....it was beautiful, a true work of art.
I then loaded up the car with food and supplies and picked up the cake as we got ready to leave. It was so heavy I could barely carry it. I walked slowly to the car and as my daughter opened the rear door, the "platter" buckled in the middle from the weight and both sides of the cake slipped off onto the street.
The girls and I just stood there looking at the mess and I burst out crying. Needless to say, she ended up with a bakery cake that year. 
Then there was the time when I was newly married and was so excited about making my husband a wonderful dinner, that I reached into the oven and took the baking pan out with my bare hands. Ended up in the ER with 2nd degree burns that time! 
_____________________________
~Kat
"...And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes...no more death, sorrow, nor crying."
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/21/2008 12:49:47 PM
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Pauley464
Posts: 520
Joined: 7/29/2007
From: Washington, Indiana
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I don't recall any serious cooking disasters or faux pas, but like Kat_D I've burned myself on a number of occasions. The worst burn was during the Christmas season about 15 years ago and a friend of my mothers asked me to make her a raisin cream pie for their family. She is a terrible baker and her husband loves raisin pies. Well, I prepared the crust and had it in the oven blind baking while I worked on the filling. When the timer for the crust went off I pulled the crust out and put it on the stove top and finished the filling. Then I went across the room to get the crust and take it back to the counter. It had been out of the oven for less than 10 or 15 seconds and without thinking I picked it up without oven mitts.
Corning Ware pie plates make very impressive scars.
< Message edited by Pauley464 -- 6/21/2008 12:56:05 PM >
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There is nothing so important that it can't be put off until tomorrow.
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/21/2008 7:34:08 PM
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Mrs.X
Posts: 2766
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: Newberg, OR
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I was making gravy from pork roast drippings. I put my glass pan (that the pork roasted in) directly on the burner and added my chicken stock and stuff and got it bubbling pretty good. It was ready to be strained so I set the glas pan on the edge o f the sink to get the strainer ready, and the sink must have been so cold that it just shatter my pyrex into a gazillion pieces. And, to top it off my 11 month old was sitting 3 feet away on the floor. The glass and gravy didn't touch him, but my foot got cut and burned.
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-Stina
From Sweet Grass to the Packin' House
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. -Proverbs 15:1
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/21/2008 11:53:50 PM
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MyCatSmokey2006
Posts: 2809
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We were making au gratin potatoes from a box and had mixed it in a Pyrex casserole, then stepped away from it. It's a good thing we did, because when I turned around, I saw that it had burst, leaving cheesy potatoes and glass everywhere.
One of my relatives once made the mistake of substituting 2 tablespoons of lemon extract for the lemon juice in a jello salad recipe. Needless to say, it was inedible.
One time, when I was a child, I cooked hominy by opening the can and pouring it, liquid and all, into a saucepan and heating it up like we did all other canned vegetables. My mother came into the kitchen, took one look and said, "What is this?" When I told her it was hominy, she laughed a little, then drained off the liquid and fried it in butter, the way it was supposed to be cooked. 
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Melissa
VOTE MCCAIN ON NOVEMBER 4TH!
Who Am I?
Visit my Cat Post!
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/23/2008 7:29:59 PM
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crazedmom
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Joined: 1/31/2008
From: Sunny Florida
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Several years ago I was cooking one of those box mixes of potatoes you throw in the microwave and add water, milk and butter. I put it all in a microwave bowl, only I must have forgotten to add the water. I set the microwave and stepped outside to talk to a neighbor for several minutes. I ran back in the house when I smelled smoke. My whole house was filled with an awful smoke and I thought I was going to blow up my microwave. We had just listed our house for sale too. All I could think was how I was going to get rid of the smoke smell out of the microwave and the house!
It took a lot of scrubbing the microwave and airing out the house every chance we could get. I also boiled a lemon in water in the microwave many times. By the way, we did wind up selling that house. Thank God!
(I haven't bought a box mix of potatoes since!) :)
_____________________________
"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing and acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my Strength and my Redeemer". Psalm 19:14
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/23/2008 7:53:37 PM
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horsepill
Posts: 120
Joined: 10/2/2006
From: Takes-izz
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I've learned you cannot substitute wax paper for parchment paper for use with baking. It's really not the same.
Speaking of paper, when you buy packages of sliced cheese (cheddar, provolone, swiss, etc.) that has those little paper squares between each slice, doubly check to make sure every paper piece is removed before putting the cheese on your bread to grill. For that first bite of paper adhered between your bread and cheese isn't the greatest of tastes.
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A word of encouragement during a failure is worth more than an hour of praise after success.
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/23/2008 9:00:30 PM
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zoebob
Posts: 8895
Joined: 4/13/2005
From: land of limbo
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My FIL once said that he never poked holes in his potatoes when baking and never had a problem. The very next week he had a potato explode
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 2:29:28 AM
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cinderella092003
Posts: 150
Joined: 6/8/2007
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lets see:
Chicken wing batter and bisquick look the same, but when making biscuits, it's best not to mistake the wing batter for bisquick 
when trying to eat healthier, don't spend 10 dollars on rice pizza dough, 5 dollars on soy cheese, 3 dollars on organic pizza sauce, and try and choke down the 20 some odd dollars you just spent on one meal. It's not worth it. 
when using a glass water dispenser, make sure you leave enough time for it to cool of from soakiing in hot water, before you pour a bunch of cold water in it to make a double batch of Kool-aid. Rest assured the bottom will break as you go to lift it, and you will have kool-aid EVERYWHERE!!! 
Some things are not dishwasher safe!!!
 
Last but not least, when seasoning food, check to make sure it is the kind with the lid that has holes before you go to shake it and inevitably dump the entire bottle on your food  
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 10:24:14 AM
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zoebob
Posts: 8895
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From: land of limbo
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quote:
Last but not least, when seasoning food, check to make sure it is the kind with the lid that has holes before you go to shake it and inevitably dump the entire bottle on your food
btdt
_____________________________
L-R: DD1, Ellies DS2, DD2, Ellies DS1
L-R: Ellies DD1, Ellies DD2, DS, Ellies DS3
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 1:03:00 PM
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pbaribeault
Posts: 1076
Joined: 4/29/2005
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Early in my marriage I got a ** great deal ** on an organic chicken at the farmer's market. It was a bit scrawny-looking, but roasted beautifully for a dinner with my mom over.
I glared at my husband as he hacked it to pieces trying to carve it, silently nixing that 'the husband should carve meat' household rule.
And then we all started to chew our portions, and chew, and chew, and chew.
Have you ever tried to eat a roasted soup chicken? I can tell you where they got the idea for rubber chickens!
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 1:28:33 PM
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Kat_D
Posts: 3173
Joined: 9/2/2005
From: Where We Shake, Rattle & Roll!
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When I was first married, without thinking, I bought and cooked my Jewish husband a Ham for dinner!
*Just to let you know what happened...
-He looked in the oven when he got home from work and said, "WHAT is that?"
-I told him and as the word crossed my lips it dawned on me...Hams and Jews, not good!
-He stuck a fork in it and threw it out on the back lawn.
-I spent the night crying in the bedroom.
_____________________________
~Kat
"...And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes...no more death, sorrow, nor crying."
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 1:30:28 PM
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Miss Giggles
Posts: 4159
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: MI
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Well i guess you never did that again!
I have dropped stuff while taking it out of the oven. Thats it.
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 1:50:52 PM
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BJinWA
Posts: 88
Joined: 5/9/2007
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this is a story told by some dear friends long ago....
she was a young bride during WWII. he was coming home on leave from the army after just winning 3 pounds of butter in a poker game. telegraphs were expensive and you were charged by the word......so he telegraphs her---"arriving 10:30 train have 3 pounds butter"
so she is frantically trying to barter/sell her gas ration coupons and come up with the money to buy 3 pounds of butter. she laughed as she explained that she had no idea why he wanted 3 pounds of butter, but she sure was going to make sure he got it.
and yes, then they had 6 pounds of butter
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RE: Cooking Bloopers 101 - 6/24/2008 3:23:52 PM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4188
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
Status: online
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left the giblets inside the first turkey I ever prepared - couldn't figure out where they were and totally freaked about making giblet gravy without giblets - mom showed me where they were, course the turkey was already cooked and the little brown wax paper was stuck inside 
boiled eggs - forget they were boiling...exploded everywhere and smelled really bad 
first time I made gravy, I left out the salt...can you say "plaster of paris?"
since I'm still cooking, there will continue to be stupid things I do without thinking...so the list will continue
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