RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (Full Version)

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still4gvn -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 1:54:40 PM)

don't feed her till the room is spotless. and make sure she also does the bathroom.

I can't seem to get motivated to do any project lately.




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 2:03:34 PM)

Go to a day spa and lay and relax be pampered. Maybe you'll feel motivated after that.




I can relate. Even just doing daily tasks is a ordeal. What do I do?




RosieCotton -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 2:31:06 PM)

go do some undaily tasks....[8D]

i like playing music loud, but my neighbors dont appreciate it!




slushie -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 4:26:22 PM)

Turn it up! All the way!

the conference i'm attending told me I could be a small group leader. A couple of days later they changed their mind. I'm bummed out. What should I do?




luv2prayzHim -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 5:48:52 PM)

Attend the small group before anyone else. As people start showing up introduce yourself as the group leader. When the real group leader shows up he might think he's the one being replaced. Voila!

My friend says that I use big words at dinner parties to which I respond, I like to be eloquent whilst I masticate my food and converse with comrades.




slushie -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 6:22:15 PM)

is that a question? Continue. The bigger the words the better. It'll sound like a different language and everyone will be so very impressed.

I have to go to a 5 year old's birthday party. All the kids will be younger than 5. What should I do there?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 7:34:59 PM)

Well you could let them finger paint all the walls! Then when all the walls are covered with handprints have them soak their hands in greasy oil put them all over the windows!!! Then prepare them a mudbath so they can be covered in mud from head to toe when their parent's arrive!!![sm=funny.gif][sm=hammerhead.gif]


I have to take my daughter and a friend to the outdoor pool. What should I do?




still4gvn -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 7:50:23 PM)

pack munchies, put on your swim suit and jump in. I just got out of the lake - first time this season bc of the cold spring.

We're going to someone's anniversary party this eve. dh just let me know it's dancing all eve. I can't dance, he can't dance but doesn't realize it, and the only shoes that fit are sneakers or sports sandals. Now what?




luv2prayzHim -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 10:23:46 PM)

Fake a sprain. That or hire a designated dancer.

I hate talk radio but those are the only stations that I can get in my car. Aside from riding home in peace and quiet or singing to myself what do you recommend?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/28/2008 11:49:02 PM)

Get a parrot. Teach all the complimentary, loving type words and all your favourite songs. Have lots of crackers on hand though.


I've got to get mowing done but it's already too late in the day.




RosieCotton -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 11:28:38 AM)

go get a goat.....[:)]

its raining but i want to go fishing......what should i do?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 12:25:04 PM)

Go to the store and buy a fish.



I'm so tired today. I wish I could sleep some more.




still4gvn -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 6:56:29 PM)

It's Sunday, so go to church and take a nice nap there. Then get a take out lunch and eat it in the tub and take another nap. Hmmm maybe I'll take my own advice.

I'm streaming Christian Bluegrass. Wish I could pick a banjo.




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 9:19:21 PM)

Poffettes You can pick a banjo with flair. Except you're missing some teeth in your mouth and your coveralls need patching.


I wish I could play a guitar.




APZR -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 9:41:03 PM)

So make one... take a Wheaties box, tie on some string, and use a good thick yard stick for the neck. You know, the thick kind of yard stick yourenz Maw used to reach out and whoop you with from 15 feet away. I never could figure out why it was called a "yard stick", 'cause my Maw could hit me clear from the middle of the kitchen!

My window are dirty, and I'm so busy at work that I don't have time to clean them. Whadda do so you don't have to look through year old gunk?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/29/2008 9:59:08 PM)

Wow you must be from Georgia!!! I'm not even from the states and can hear the southern accent!! Just paint all your windows black and then you won't have to worry about the gunk.

I need to go on a strict diet.




still4gvn -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/30/2008 11:29:07 AM)

try the 'Ms Piggy Diet': only eat foods that are on a diet - any diet. chocolate and steak from the no-carb diet, any fruit from the fruit diet, egg rolls and shrimp chow mein from an Asian diet...

I need to do something useful with my life that's not to hard. suggestions?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (6/30/2008 4:46:29 PM)

You could be a sign carrier for the highways dept in construction season. A greeter for Wal-Mart.



I agree I need to do something worthwhile for a change. LOL




APZR -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 12:29:16 AM)

Change? Jes' do what we dun... hook up yourens house to the pick up truck and change the direction it faces.

We gots so much squash in the garden, our friends don't like to see us coming anymore fer fear they'd get 'nother mess of the yellow gourd. Whadda do?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 3:13:12 AM)

Set up a stand in the Farmer's Market selling squash. Name them Larry Gourd. Dress them up as the Gourds on Veggie Tales.



I need to get to sleep as it's Canada Day tomorrow. What I should I do? We already watched fireworks tonight.




slushie -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 10:15:52 AM)

Is there anything you can do that will make you not sleep? Do that. It works wonders, trust me. Especially if the next day is an important day.

How do I hitch a ride to New York?




MissGizmo -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 10:26:03 AM)

Go to nearest truck stop & hold out a cardboard sign saying "NEW YORK OR BUST" That should get you a ride in an 18wheeler.

I need to entertain several people and don't know when will be a good time to do it. Any ideas?




Carleejoan -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 12:58:46 PM)

You could "entertain" them about 5 AM. Give them breakfast brunch food. Have them arrive with their PJs on!!


It's Canada Day today!! How do we stay cool as we're not used to hot days???




APZR -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 2:08:00 PM)

Eat a batch of Cayenne pepper chased by grilled jalapeņo peppers, then relax under a ceiling fan.

How do you find the motivation to get back to work after a national holiday?




still4gvn -> RE: Bad Advice III New Starter one! You guys! (7/1/2008 8:48:49 PM)

It's easy if you take your time and pick the right holiday. Like if you take off for Canada Day or the 4th of July, go back after Christmas or groundhog day.

I got sunburned on the back of my neck from being in the kayak with my hair up. What's a remedy?




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