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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 4:32:34 PM
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clag4christ
Posts: 2632
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: We just moved to the big state of Texas!
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nicole6598
I think its come to a point where maybe we do need a sub section, this type of thing has been going on for a while, where some people don't want to see the threads, others do etc
Then, imo, those particular women/people should just avoid reading those threads...
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 4:44:03 PM
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Karaboo2
Posts: 2775
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
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If anyone is interested, Fritz was logged in 2 hours ago ... haven't seen him post here, though. Wonder if he's still reading / deciding what to do (or trying to find the biggest aspirin bottle around to ward off any headache this'll cause him!)
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Tea Drinkers Anonymous
<-- Caleb in a computer box
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 6:09:07 PM
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Roberta_
Posts: 7427
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: East Bay Area
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Fritz likes fudge - a lot!
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 6:14:48 PM
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Karaboo2
Posts: 2775
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
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quote:
No coming into the community and proclaiming that God told you that everyone should send the Community Manager massive amounts of fudge. -- From TOS #16
I guess it's okay if it's Roberta telling me, though!
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Kara
Tea Drinkers Anonymous
<-- Caleb in a computer box
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 6:23:47 PM
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TwinCityGirl
Posts: 1191
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My post is different and my stance is probably unpopular:
THANK YOU, FRITZ, for all that you do to run this site. I do recognize this is a courtesy that is provided and that at any time the forums powers-that-be have to do what they have to do -- and that those powers don't owe us an explanation or another thread or a sub-folder or being grandfathered in. THANK YOU FOR ALLOWING US ALL TO GATHER HERE, for however long these forums last.
My unpopular stance is, being a middle child myself, I always have a heart for the underdog and I did not care for the individual threads (that is what the Pregnancy thread is for -- to talk about pregnancies, which labor/delivery is part of). I didn't like how some threads would talk about a whole host of completely NOT RELATED TO PREGNANCY/Labor & Delivery --- just turned into chit-chat with some pregnancy talk peppered in, while maybe other women's threads (maybe people who hadn't been around as long or were as well known) had fewer visitors to their threads. THAT IS THE MIDDLE CHILD IN ME. A one-stop shopping kind of thread is much easier FOR ME to read.
I recognize I am very different in that when I was recently pregnant I didn't even announce it here till last-minute and I did NOT want a "stalking" thread at all and those wishes were respected. Since I had several people PM me wanting to know if there would be information posted about the baby once he came, I did tell Donna to feel free to start a generic thread "Jeanie had the baby" in the Community folder, which is exactly what she did. (Thanks, Donna.) People went there (male and female) and said "Congratulations". It was nice.
I have never shared my birth story here but then again I am maybe one of the few who still is keenly aware that NOTHING HERE IS PRIVATE and if you put it out here, it's out here. In the kindest way possible, if you do not want a man to read your birth story or hear about your cervical mucous, PM or email each other and talk that way, because I'm sure we have any number of teenage boys or adult men that have kept up on our lives: it is not private if it is posted on the WORLD-WIDE WEB.
So for me, I have no issues at all with the threads being gone, and I think if you've ever worked in the Information Technology field in the programming and maintenance end of it (and I have, and my husband does) you roll with these kinds of changes much more easily because you understand the behind-the-scenes perhaps a bit further. I'm trying to be so careful in what I say so as not to upset anyone, but none of us own this site. We are only visitors and no matter how much we take it on as our own, threads being moved/deleted is up to those in charge -- and ladies, that's just not us.
All that being said, I am sorry for the laboring moms, the impending labor moms and the newly post-partum moms that this is so hard for you, and during what is already a heavily emotional time for you. Even if you don't get your thread back to save somewhere, please know you are just as supported whether you have to share a multi-person thread or still had your own.
Thanks Fritz, and thanks ladies.
Jeanie
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 7:43:21 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 4869
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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quote:
So for me, I have no issues at all with the threads being gone
It's not just about them getting moved to somewhere else, it's that there was NO warning for women to even be able to copy all the encouragement they received while in labor, or even at the end of their pregnancy. I went back and re-read mine today while I was copying my birth story(since I lost my other copy when my old laptop was stolen) and it was a very emotional thing to read. Women deserved to have a chance to copy that before it was just deleted without warning.
I am very disheartened at the way the whole thing was handled, it was not done in the same "spirit" of community that I have come to know and love.
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 8:34:23 PM
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nicole6598
Posts: 3815
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Uh huh Ryanne, I read mine too, I think you, me and Yolanda were the first real "stalking" threads, and after my disappearnce for a week beforehand or having Nath, to get all the love, support and encouragment before I had him was wonderful, and to look back now and see all the congrats and stuff, it just gives me warm fuzzies.
Jeanie you didn't really care for one so maybe that's why you can't see why it does hurt others so much? Some people like that sort of thing, others don't, but there should have been warning or some clarity to see that on the list there is a HUGE amount of women having babies at the moment and once they all have their babies those threads will disappear again til the next mummy gives birth. I really dont see what the big problem was 
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 8:40:22 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 645
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And here you have another unpopular view of the whole thing......
I also was VERY glad to see a lot of the pregnancy and childbirth threads not in there anymore. I had made a formal request recently that another sub-folder be made for anything pregnancy/childbirth/baby related. Mostly, if a subject is not related to childbirth and pregnancy, it gets buried very quickly. And, there is more to being a woman then having babies. Not to mention, the baby chat thread should be in parenting. At the point when I made the suggestion, in the front page of the personal section, 17 of the 24 threads were trying to get pregnant, pregnant, childbirth or baby related. WAY too much!
I am sad for those who lost birth stories and I hope they are able to get them back. I also hope that the powers that be seriously consider the pregnancy sub-folder idea. There is obviously a need for that kind of support. But, we women who really could care less about pregnancy and such should not be made to thumb through all those threads to the ones we want to follow and respond to. So, a sub-folder in my opinion is the best solution for everyone involved.
This same kind of clean up has happened in other areas of CW since I have been a member here. Single's went through the same thing about a year ago. Everyone was upset that threads were moved to other areas. I hated that I was made to follow threads in other areas. But I'm glad it happened in the long run. I met new people and got involved in conversations I never would have otherwise.
I don't know if it was my suggestion or complaint that caused this or not. But again, I really hope the ladies who lost their thread are able to get copies of them.
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 8:59:01 PM
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Karaboo2
Posts: 2775
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
Not to mention, the baby chat thread should be in parenting.
Actually, no it shouldn't ... it is (a lot of the time) dealing with very personal post-partum issues, including medical issues, intimacy issues, etc ... things which should NOT be discussed in mixed company.
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Kara
Tea Drinkers Anonymous
<-- Caleb in a computer box
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 8:59:50 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 645
Joined: 4/10/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Karaboo2
quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
Not to mention, the baby chat thread should be in parenting.
Actually, no it shouldn't ... it is (a lot of the time) dealing with very personal post-partum issues, including medical issues, intimacy issues, etc ... things which should NOT be discussed in mixed company.
Then shouldn't those issues be in the post-partum thread then?
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:04:59 PM
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firefightermama
Posts: 1335
Joined: 10/24/2006
From: Canada
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nicole6598
Uh huh Ryanne, I read mine too, I think you, me and Yolanda were the first real "stalking" threads, and after my disappearnce for a week beforehand or having Nath, to get all the love, support and encouragment before I had him was wonderful, and to look back now and see all the congrats and stuff, it just gives me warm fuzzies.
The difference then was that they were started when the mom was in labour (not a month beforehand), and only lasted a few days after the birth. Individual issues were taken to pregnancy/postpartum/baby chat/mommy's milk threads.
(which in my logical compartmentalized brain, makes more sense)
quote:
ORIGINAL: TwinCityGirl
My unpopular stance is, being a middle child myself, I always have a heart for the underdog and I did not care for the individual threads (that is what the Pregnancy thread is for -- to talk about pregnancies, which labor/delivery is part of). I didn't like how some threads would talk about a whole host of completely NOT RELATED TO PREGNANCY/Labor & Delivery --- just turned into chit-chat with some pregnancy talk peppered in, while maybe other women's threads (maybe people who hadn't been around as long or were as well known) had fewer visitors to their threads. THAT IS THE MIDDLE CHILD IN ME. A one-stop shopping kind of thread is much easier FOR ME to read.
I have never shared my birth story here but then again I am maybe one of the few who still is keenly aware that NOTHING HERE IS PRIVATE and if you put it out here, it's out here. In the kindest way possible, if you do not want a man to read your birth story or hear about your cervical mucous, PM or email each other and talk that way, because I'm sure we have any number of teenage boys or adult men that have kept up on our lives: it is not private if it is posted on the WORLD-WIDE WEB.
Jeanie
I ditto Jeanie (bolding mine)
They did say that the threads had been removed from view, not that they had been deleted, perhaps those concerned may still be able to have a copy somehow. I do feel bad that those were lost 
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:06:17 PM
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Karaboo2
Posts: 2775
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
Single's went through the same thing about a year ago. Everyone was upset that threads were moved to other areas. I hated that I was made to follow threads in other areas. But I'm glad it happened in the long run.
Your threads were only moved ... ours were deleted with no warning whatsoever. Labouring women who have come looking for their personal thread don't have them anymore .. anywhere.
quote:
Then shouldn't those issues be in the post-partum thread then?
Not always ... sometimes they are referring to medical issues with the babies which are also related to medical issues with themselves. And if you are in the middle of posting a whole story, it is often too difficult to try to split your thoughts into 2-3 threads or more.
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Kara
Tea Drinkers Anonymous
<-- Caleb in a computer box
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:07:32 PM
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artemis
Posts: 865
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This will not be a popular post, so if you prefer, skip it and read the next one. I am generally a very quiet and laid-back person... in 10 years of reading Crosswalk and almost 5 years of regularly posting, I have only complained to a modorator once and after she replied, I shut up about my complaint  But the "baby stalking" threads are something that I've been discussing regularly with my husband and since everyone else is giving their opinion, I thought I'd share mine as well. Like I said, it won't go with the general flow, but I've been thinking about my response all day and have not posted until now because my emotions and opinions on the subject are extremely strong. Trust me when I say that this is the "wittled down" and "nice" version 
I hate the "baby stalking" threads. I realize that "hate" is a strong word and that is exactly the word I meant to use. The women's folder on Crosswalk has often felt like a Mommies-Only Club and the "baby stalking" threads (in my opinion, of course) only perpetuate that atmosphere. They originally began for high risk pregnancies/deliveries, then they seemed to be started for "popular" posters and eventually anyone who had logged on and stated they were pregnant appeared to have one. Many are started a freaking month before someone is due and may still be active a month or more after the baby is delivered. I know everyone says you can just ignore the threads you don't like, but it is not unusual to find that 10 of the last 15 threads in the Women's Only-Personal Issues forums are "baby stalking" threads. I can easily ignore one or two threads, but the saturation of the forums with these particular threads makes it extremely difficult to do so. Also, to me, they are a violation of the TOS against starting the same/similar threads. If it matters at all, I had planned on asking NOT to have a stalking thread when my baby was due. I had already started working on how I would word the request so as not to hurt anyone's feelings. I might have thrown out that caution with this post
Still, I am very sorry for the women who lost their existing threads and hope that they can somehow be retrieved. Maybe the situation wasn't handled well; maybe there is something that can be done to rectify the hurt some people are feeling. But in my oh-so-humble-opinion, it was a necessary and long-overdue step to take.
Now, I will go back to being quiet, calm and nice. This is about half the post I had planned on writing this morning and tomorrow I will probably feel bad about writing it at all, but I do think it is important that all opinions are heard. I think that a lot of people who have a problem with the "baby stalking" threads have probably already stopped reading the Women's Only section or the Women's Only-Personal Issues section or have left Crosswalk completely, so their side won't be heard as strongly as those who frequent those areas of Crosswalk.
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:28:50 PM
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nicole6598
Posts: 3815
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"popular" I don't think I consider myself one of those and mine was one of the first. Like Yolanda said, ours was done only a week before our babies were due, not a month though. I see your point artemis and Sharon and Jeanie, but this is a place for everyone, and the majority of women on here are mothers or are pregnant which is why there are so many posts about it.
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Proud Aussie, Wife, Mother, Woman!
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:35:48 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 645
Joined: 4/10/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nicole6598
"popular" I don't think I consider myself one of those and mine was one of the first. Like Yolanda said, ours was done only a week before our babies were due, not a month though. I see your point artemis and Sharon and Jeanie, but this is a place for everyone, and the majority of women on here are mothers or are pregnant which is why there are so many posts about it.
And there are still many threads to post in regarding those issues. But, those threads need not dominate the women's only area which is exactly what they were doing.
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RE: Feedback on WO-personal - 6/24/2008 9:37:22 PM
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artemis
Posts: 865
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nicole6598
"popular" I don't think I consider myself one of those and mine was one of the first. Like Yolanda said, ours was done only a week before our babies were due, not a month though. I see your point artemis and Sharon and Jeanie, but this is a place for everyone, and the majority of women on here are mothers or are pregnant which is why there are so many posts about it.
They are now. Many women who are single or don't have kids avoid the Women's Only forum because of the innundation of baby related threads. Some have left Crosswalk altogether.
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