To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (Full Version)

All Forums >> [People] >> Singles



Message

Tinkerbell_ -> To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 9:26:13 AM)

Okay...I saw this in another thread and thought we should have a seperate thread about it. [8D]

I am a 29 year old single mum with two boys one will be 12 on the 25th *groan* and the other is 8.5. [:)]

Right now at this time in my life I do not want anymore children. I will be turning 40 the same year my youngest graduates from high school and quite frankly don't want to start all over again.

I am not opposed to fostering or adopting older children, but I definitely don't want to start from infancy.

However God may have different ideas than me. [&:]

So for you single people out there...do you want to have children at an older age? And I say older because most of us are in our 30's or 40's so we will be 'older' than some. *shrug*

Why or why not?



Grace-N-Mercy -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question. (7/1/2008 9:33:34 AM)

I'm a little hesitant at putting this out there because this will severely limit my already small pool of potentials. [;)] But I've raised a child... he is now an adult. Having another child at this point in my life would be kinda strange... he's old enough to have children of his own. I'm not at all opposed to being a step-mom to young children and if it's God's will for me to have another child of my own, I will not stand in His way. But I'm not going to pretend to want a quiver-full of children at this point in my life, either.



JustJeannie -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question. (7/1/2008 9:53:22 AM)

My "baby" is almost 12 years old, but I actually WOULD like to have another child IF I find/marry a Christian man that does not have children of his own. I think if he already has kids, then he probably wouldn't want more, either....

I guess I'm with GnM in the fact that if God says I should have more kids, who am I to argue.......LOL[8D]



ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question. (7/1/2008 9:53:36 AM)

When I first became widowed, I would have been able and willing to have more children. But now, biologically my body is simply not in any kind of shape for making babies, though the thing would still be possible.

All I can say is that if God wanted more babies from me He wasted the last 7 or so years. So I guess He wasn't planning on that.

I would be VERY glad to step-parent any number of children of any age at all.

besiderself



Prairiehiker -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question. (7/1/2008 10:23:27 AM)

I'm turning 40 this year. There's no way I'd have another child. I have an enormous fear of childbirth. However, I love children, esp little ones. If I marry someone, I really would like him to have children. I have a few reason for this. I'd like a big family. I also would like the man to have the experience of having his own children. My daughter would welcome having children in the house. I just think it would be so much fun to have a house full of laughter of children. They are priceless when they are playing. I recently went camping with some friends with children (there must have been 10 children there) and my kid had a blast. All the kids played all day at the beach. If I were to marry anytime soon, that's how I would want our family to look like, except with less kids.

Maybe 10 years from now when I'm 50, I'll be OK with just grown children. But now, I wouldn't mind having smaller children.



FunBetty -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question. (7/1/2008 10:28:34 AM)

I was sent in here. Humpf! Someone must be implying that I'm older! [8D]

For me, I have no kiddos, but I'm only 31! If the good Lord should bless me with a husband while still in childbearing years then I see no reason to not have kids. Of course, that's up to me, the hubby in question, and God!



Focusing -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 11:00:34 AM)

quote:

So for you single people out there...do you want to have children at an older age?

Nope. I have no desire to have more children at this point in my life. The idea of having children in high school when I'm retired doesn't appeal to me.



coinpurse -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 11:09:01 AM)

I dont have any kids...

Id like to give birth ONLY ONCE! Im guessing if this is to happen, God will need to introduce me to Mr. right sooner than later...the 30s are going by really fast!

Im open to a blended family type deal...Im open to foster care as well and possibly adoption (If I can afford it financially, I know adoption isnt free)...I think I was made to live within a blended family/have kids I didnt give birth to. I still would love to go into labor just once.

Edit to add: I dont think Id be open to any children after 40-41. I have about 6 years:) Miracles need to be happening within those 6 years...After that, Ill get a dog or 2 and sponsor a few more kids through World Vision...



landabee -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 11:11:41 AM)

I have two great sons: 16 and 18.

I have single parented them since my divorce, when the eldest was not quite two years old.

That said:


I.


Do.


Not.



Wish.


To.

Have.


Any.

More.


However, I would be willing to marry someone with children near my kid's ages or older.

Just not signing up for another full round. KWIM?

I'm 42 this month, BTW.


Love kids. But I'm done. [:)]



OneOfHisJewels -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 12:28:53 PM)

Yes, I still want children. But between pcos and my age, I might have to have them through adoption or the husband having kids, that's ok cause I always wanted to adopt anyways. As far as the biological child it may not seem as likely, but with God, all things are possible.



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 12:40:05 PM)

I am 42 years old.
I absolutely love children. I just had 8 kids in my home for a week and I loved it. If circumstances had not been what they were with Hubby being sick and all….I would have loved to have at least 2 more babies. However, things have changed. If my new husband wanted to have more, I would, gladly (I have a few good years left[:D]). The ideal would be a marriage to a man who already has children full time, any age. I love doing the mom thing, that said, I am looking forward to the years I will have with my husband alone also, once they are grown.



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 12:43:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels

Yes, I still want children. But between pcos and my age, I might have to have them through adoption or the husband having kids, that's ok cause I always wanted to adopt anyways. As far as the biological child it may not seem as likely, but with God, all things are possible.


You are very young still. I have a friend who gave birth to her first child 2 years ago at the age of 47.



John_O -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 4:08:40 PM)

I've got the Girl who is seven. I pray that God will send me a woman who is willing to have children with me.



RosieCotton -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 4:48:15 PM)

yes, yes, yes........i would love to have children!!!!! [:D][:D][:D]

I would also want to adopt and foster.



Blazingson -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 6:18:38 PM)

I am 45 and I would dearly love to have children, particularly daughters, but judging from the posts of all you lady's my age, and if all other women my age feel the same, I guess I'm just out of luck.

[Edited by moderator - TOS 5]



RosieCotton -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 6:20:03 PM)

no, not necessarily!!!!

I'll go back to my parents......my dad was 54 when my little sister was born!!! [:D]



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 6:32:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blazingson

I am 45 and I would dearly love to have children, particularly daughters, but judging from the posts of all you lady's my age, and if all other women my age feel the same, I guess I'm just SOL.


Men don't have a biological clock that ticks down the years for procreation like women do. You have plenty of time. The right woman will want to have children, if that is your desire.



FunBetty -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 6:35:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WaitingforBoaz

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blazingson

I am 45 and I would dearly love to have children, particularly daughters, but judging from the posts of all you lady's my age, and if all other women my age feel the same, I guess I'm just SOL.


Men don't have a biological clock that ticks down the years for procreation like women do. You have plenty of time. The right woman will want to have children, if that is your desire.



So THAT'S what that ticking noise has been! [:D]



RosieCotton -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 6:42:16 PM)

what about parenting while being single........is that a different thread????

i mean, right now at this very moment, i dont see marriage at all in the near future......but, i would looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove one day to be a momma.......i talked to my mom the other day, and for the first time she was like, that would be very hard as a single parent.

I've alwayz had a dream of children in my own home........and alwayz thought when i got myself financially stable i would love to foster and adopt some precious little one.

I know we've talked about this before.......but, just was something i was thinking about recently.



kj88il -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/1/2008 11:07:58 PM)

wow! i am definitely in the minority here (at least so far)!!!

no...i DO NOT want any more children...and if i am blessed with another man in my life...i would pray HE does not want any (more) children....AND i pray he doesn't have any young children.

my kids are 21 and 14-1/2. i will be 42 in august....and have no desire whatsoever to go back to the baby/youngster childrearing days. i am oh-so-grateful to be past that time of my life. and i would hope that my man and i could enjoy our time together primarily as a couple.

i have to laugh tho.......God could have a totally different plan for me...He's surprised me before! i got pregnant with my daughter (my oldest) while using not one but TWO forms of birth control!!! tell me God didn't know better what i really needed and when! lol

and at my first OB appt with my son...i MADE the nurse write on my chart that i wanted a tubal before i left the hospital, after delivery! i was almost yelling at her, cuz she kept insisting i was too young to decide that (i was 27....give me a break! lol).

but i'm not worried about it. i absolutely believe God doesn't want me to go there again. but He knows i'll be ready to do the g'ma thing in the not-too-far-off-future. i got no problems with being a young g'ma!! lol



song -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/2/2008 1:51:46 AM)

I'm only in my 20s. [;)]

But I don't want to have children till I'm in my 30s. I think you make better parents when you're older. [:)]

Just my opinion.



ta_mosquito -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/2/2008 1:01:20 PM)

MODERATOR'S NOTE :: ATTENTION PLEASE

I've deleted and/or edited a few posts for TOS 5 and/or being off topic. Please return to the thread topic. [;)]

Thanks!

Tricia
Forums Moderator

Please do not reply to this message within the forums or chat.

Please email Community@salemwebnetwork.com with questions, comments, or concerns.

Please do not send me PMs regarding this message.



betterisoneday -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/2/2008 9:08:29 PM)

Well, I'm not 30 yet (27) but I definitely want more children. My sons are just turned 6 and 4 and I'd love at least three more and adopt a few too. But I'll have to wait a while longer to see if G-d allows that.



drmomjoyce -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/4/2008 7:36:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RosieCotton

what about parenting while being single........is that a different thread????

i mean, right now at this very moment, i dont see marriage at all in the near future......but, i would looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove one day to be a momma.......i talked to my mom the other day, and for the first time she was like, that would be very hard as a single parent.

I've alwayz had a dream of children in my own home........and alwayz thought when i got myself financially stable i would love to foster and adopt some precious little one.

I know we've talked about this before.......but, just was something i was thinking about recently.

Hi rosiecotton
i am not sure if i have replied to you before but i recently adopted my son and I too am single. One thing i would encourage is to have a really good support network - as in family or church family although i think i am leaning towards being closer to biological family - it get relief when needed. I have an awful time asking for help with him and getting away for a wee bit is really necessary. I basically have him 24/7 for the first 3 months he was home and i dont regret that as we have bonded like crazy glue[:D], but a break needs to happen otherwise you break - and i nearly did.
If you want to know more leave me a message and I will try fill you in on what I have experienced so far. All the above aside I would love to adopt again for him to have another kid around but also to share my attention on another child. As a single it has its challenges but i would do it all over again.
Joyce



J3jamie -> RE: To parent, or not to parent...that is the question for singles (7/5/2008 3:54:35 PM)

I had my daughter at age 32. I would like more children. But don't know if that is in God's plans right now. I do hear the clock a ticking.

I think with people living longer, many are having children older. I know I have more patience than I did when I was younger. But I also do not have the same amount of energy.

For those who would love to have children in their lives now, consider foster care. There is always a need to foster (not adopt) infants and toddlers. It can be very rewarding.



Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>



Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition 2.5 ANSI