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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say...

 
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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/18/2008 2:57:36 PM   
Jenny-Fair


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Go to your room and practice burping quietly. At least ten burps!

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/18/2008 3:19:36 PM   
daisies4u


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Joined: 10/16/2006
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These are all hilarious. I needed a laugh today!!
Post #: 27
RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/19/2008 9:02:50 PM   
betterisoneday


Posts: 194
Joined: 1/10/2008
Status: online
"We don't play with dead worms!" Tonight after my son offered to unlock the front door with one he had just picked up.

Of course, this is the same child to whom my parents said "We don't chew on rocks during supper". (He had kept the rock in his mouth through the whole meal before anyone noticed.)


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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/21/2008 1:24:23 PM   
zoebob


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Joined: 4/13/2005
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Get your feet out of your mouth

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/22/2008 4:39:33 PM   
Geeky1

 

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Son, you have an eel in my bathroom (referring to a stuffed moray eel he had)

Why is there a crocodile in my bed? (another stuffed animal)

Why is Pikachu in the refrigerator?
Post #: 30
RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/24/2008 5:15:13 PM   
Sideways

 

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No, Nathan, we don't color the cats.

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/25/2008 9:08:44 AM   
Tinkerbell_


Posts: 6155
Joined: 1/25/2008
From: NeverNeverLand
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quote:

ORIGINAL: karlie

No, I don't want to see a cherry loogie

Popsicles aren't bath toys

Take the straw out of your oatmeal, please

No, you do not have prostate problems...you're a girl.

You're going to catch your socks on fire (this, just last night to my 20 year old. Oy.)


That reminded me of something my mum told my brother when he was 18 or 19. "Next time, please take your shirt off before you iron it."

And the other night, "No...you can't wear the dog's diapers." to my 8 year old.

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/25/2008 12:59:31 PM   
Zhi


Posts: 1185
Joined: 7/31/2007
Status: online
Today, I informed my daughter "You slapped a banana. What did you expect?" (her peeled half of a banana was on my desk, she smacked it for some reason then got all upset due to the gooshed banana on her hand). Then I thought "Huh. That's new..."

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/30/2008 9:21:26 PM   
rainbowtvp


Posts: 1016
Joined: 4/21/2005
From: The Unted State of Confusion
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How 'bout what I had to say tonight to my 19 yo....

Smoke that cigarette before you get into the car.

He just started smoking... We were on our way home from the park (he in his car; me in mine) and he was pulling the cigarettes out of his pocket. I didn't want him to drive with a cigarette in his hand, esp since he had the dog in his car. Our rule is no smoking in the house or our car, but beyond that... he is an adult and can make his own decisions.

We did all the right things. Neither of us smoke, we don't allow smoking in our home, we know their friends (who don't smoke), we taught them about the dangers. And they say if you can keep them from smoking until they are 18, you are safe, because very few people start after that. <sigh>

Which is a long way from the good old days when it was just stuff like, "Get OUT of the basketball hoop!"

Tara P

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/30/2008 10:55:00 PM   
PrincessButtercup


Posts: 9736
Joined: 4/21/2007
From: not my home...
Status: online
Wow.

This thread makes my belly hurt.

Thanks for the laughs! Now I just have to wonder what kind of things I'll have to say to my kid...

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RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... - 7/31/2008 3:44:28 PM   
ChelaW

 

Posts: 74
Joined: 7/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_


"Quit giving your brother wedgies!" "I'm not! I'm giving myself a wedgie!" "Then quit giving yourself wedgies! You're scaring your brother!"




LOLOLOL!! This literally made me LOL at work!

To my 3 yo DD, "No, God is not in your tummy." or "No, God doesn't want you to have cake, candy or ice cream, either" after I told her she couldn't have any she insisted that God wanted her to!
Post #: 36
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