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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/12/2008 12:16:25 AM
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relady
Posts: 1279
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Greater St. Louis Metro
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Wow, I don't think I would have paid it. I would have disputed it, but that's just me. Close that account. Now.
Have you been using the account? I'm surprised the bank didn't close it out unless you've continued to use it.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/12/2008 7:50:29 AM
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conrack50
Posts: 798
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From: 200 N. Bryan Ave. Shawnee, Ok 74801
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In my opinion, you should contact each person you pay a bill to and let them know
you are the only one to be on the account. This includes banks,credit unions,credit cards,anyone you pay something to.
I paid for a costly mistake like yours for 10 long years.Made me angry every time I had to make a payment for something my ex did. I learned after that.
Just be careful in the future.
Connie Lou
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/12/2008 11:44:54 AM
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DayStar43
Posts: 39
Joined: 3/31/2007
From: Texas
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When there is a separation and divorce, every credit account should be closed so that no further transactions can be added. You can close down accounts with balances. As long as there is a balance, each spouse is responsible. No matter what debts the judge gives to a spouse, both are still liable. Credit is a contract and a divorce does not negate liability for all parties involved. Unfortunately, ex-spouses may continue to use your social security number to obtain credit. Lenders are not always honest in making sure that the signature is legit.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/12/2008 12:09:39 PM
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BlueAdept
Posts: 99
Joined: 4/18/2005
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Since your divorce was so long ago, you are likely not responsible for any of that bill. Prior to paying it, unless it is a very small amount, I would contact your attorny and have them contact your ex.
If you pay this bill, what will prevent him from repeating it?
I think you could dispute it, and also work to get your name off the account.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/12/2008 12:10:26 PM
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sisrev
Posts: 886
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From: The South, ya'll
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I'm afraid that because this is a legitimately joint account, even though you haven't been the user for all these years, you are still liable. You might try contacting the bank directly to see if their is any kind of loophole, but generally when you open a joint bank account, both of you are equally liable, even if the other person is the one who wrote the bad checks.
I would for sure write a letter to the bank, making sure that you officially close the account, so that once this is paid off, he can't continue to use the account and do the same thing. I'd also go back and find any records you have of any other joint accounts you may have had and be sure that they are all closed.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/15/2008 7:25:31 PM
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Focusing
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quote:
don't you have to have the permission of both parties to close a joint account?
No. I closed out our joint bank accounts without his involvement, based on my attorney's advice. Unfortunately, in my case, he also overdrew the account ... and I had to settle the account when I closed it out.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/15/2008 8:36:23 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6385
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From: WA
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Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.
My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/15/2008 8:49:29 PM
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sisrev
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.
My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.
She's been divorced for 9 years--no tax issues there.
Also--you cannot remove one person from an account, but either person can close the account without the other.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/15/2008 9:03:12 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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From: WA
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I know my advice doesn't apply to the OP, but people read these threads later on for help in their own situations.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/15/2008 9:19:12 PM
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Bagel
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From: Oregon
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can't you remove yourself though from a joint account? I used to be a joint signer on my step-father's account and then later I was able to remove myself from that account without him having to sign anything.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/16/2008 5:44:09 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 5097
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From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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You definitely have to get everything in writing, don't pay a dime until you do. Also, even though you have already "agreed" to pay you can still(and definitely should) request verification of the debt. If it's already with collections they may not be able to provide adequate proof that the debt is "yours" and it would then need to be removed from your credit report without you having to pay anything.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/16/2008 7:17:13 PM
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NotDoneYet
Posts: 288
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From: Virginia
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.
My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.
Jenny, I don't think this is a true statement...
We have our refund direct-deposited every year and we have no joint accounts. It goes into my account and then we split it. We've never had any problems with that, either state or federal refunds. Check with the IRS tho.
(the reason we have no joint accounts is a very long story, painful lessons learned from x-spouses)...
NDY
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/16/2008 7:24:20 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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It is possible their rules have changed in the 12 years since I have been divorced, but when I filed my taxes, the regulations stated that the account had to be in both our names.
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Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/18/2008 1:07:05 AM
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MrsTracy72
Posts: 1762
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I do come from a collections background and I would definately not pay them until they send you a letter stating the terms. And also make sure that you do take your name off of the account and any other accounts that you might have forgotten about. If your name is still on the account, you still owe the money. At least from a legal standpoint, but you can take him to court and sue him for that money and your attorney and court costs since he did that and you paid for it. That all depends on how far you want to take it. But make sure that you get a letter before you pay of the terms, then make sure that you get a letter after you pay that the reference on your credit has been DELETED, not updated to be Paid in Full. There is a difference between the two.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/29/2008 12:51:58 PM
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Ps103
Posts: 11667
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From: Here, now
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Jamie, I went to that website, and it did not sound very professional to me.
I wouldn't pay them for anything.
Call CCCS in Atlanta, or another reputable company.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 9/30/2008 6:33:00 PM
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Lynn_J
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Joined: 9/3/2008
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I'm surprised that your attorney did not include division of the funds and/or closing the bank account in the divorce settlement or decree. Usually such things are included in the property settlement. Was that not the case here?
Lynn
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 10/1/2008 6:31:38 PM
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JJB1222
Posts: 227
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: where the mountains meet the sea, Puget Sound.
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Maybe it was...it's been so long...and there wasn't much to fight over like a house or investments or anything. And I don't think he even read the divorce papers. It happened by default (in other words...after no response from him for 90 days after filing, the divorce just went through).
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 10/1/2008 7:19:39 PM
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Lynn_J
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The reason I asked is that even if it went through by default, there was some sort of decree or order signed by the judge. You may want to pull out your copy to see if any reference is in there about bank accounts. I was a divorce paralegal several years ago, and while I cannot give legal advice because I am not an attorney, I have seen in some cases (depending upon the state laws) that a copy of the divorce decree can help with the cancellation of a debt. Just something to ask your attorney about.
I pray that this gets resolved for you soon. Hang in there.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 10/1/2008 9:07:06 PM
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Ps103
Posts: 11667
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From: Here, now
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Lynn_J
The reason I asked is that even if it went through by default, there was some sort of decree or order signed by the judge. You may want to pull out your copy to see if any reference is in there about bank accounts. I was a divorce paralegal several years ago, and while I cannot give legal advice because I am not an attorney, I have seen in some cases (depending upon the state laws) that a copy of the divorce decree can help with the cancellation of a debt. Just something to ask your attorney about.
I pray that this gets resolved for you soon. Hang in there.
Courts usually do divide things that way, Lynn, but the creditors are not bound to honor them. The judge's orders apply only to the two parties in the divorce--no one else.
I have seen some creditor's go with the decree, but many more ignore them...because they can, and they only want their money.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 10/1/2008 11:18:21 PM
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Lynn_J
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Joined: 9/3/2008
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You are correct. It just happened to work that way for me on one of my debts. The creditor accepted a certified copy of the decree and then removed my name from the account.
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RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! - 10/3/2008 8:17:37 PM
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JJB1222
Posts: 227
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I suppose it's worth a try right?
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It's just best to cut off all ties ASAP.
