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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 3:46:09 PM
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myka
Posts: 810
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quote:
I base that purely on the biology that the chances of getting pregnant from one fornication is almost nill.
This is an incorrect assumption. A single act of fornication can have a pretty high rate for pregnancy depending on the timing.(somewhere around 40%) So, saying it is a 'lifestyle' of sin could be incorrect since we don't know exactly how many times this particular sin occurred.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 5:06:42 PM
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hjemerson
Posts: 233
Joined: 3/4/2008
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one of the longest threat I have read on here . Yes missed achance to show love. to a hurting young peron.her family and her unchurch friends/
Womem of the church are the loser to they could done somthing to witness to other .Bet they don't do much of any thing ,
I worked with youth 20+ yr Have been their and seen the good than can be done when you reach out of your box to others,
When we were married 26 yr we has the same thing with a young lady in our group the church turn on her forbit other youth to talk or be seen with her, Wow I thiugh today thing would have changed. (by the way that young lady stood strong came back to the church rasied her son and he is now on the misson field ! It would be so much easier for young women to abort, I alway said christions could put clincs out of busnesiness if they put their money/time where their mouth was, So said that I hope this young lady will find the love.support .CHRISTIAN care some where she did not get it at the frist place see looked. I feel the church SHOULD be used for AS many activives as the build can hold reach out to a hurting world.
I also belive sex should be taught in the church and protect and care for self along with it, In a loveing care maner if you many of our youth.pastor kids etc would know and it would be a things of the past , Jut me and what I think ,
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 7:08:01 PM
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scottishmomma46
Posts: 178
Joined: 4/7/2006
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uh pardon me but "young girls" are not the only ones who do wrong, and it's not just because i am a woman, but it sounds like your forgetting that young men also need to be known that they can also be tempted as well as the young girls.
and your church or that church needs to be a little bit more forgiving and they are not going what Jesus would do., i feel sorry for a church who does not practice the way of Jesus
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 7:46:50 PM
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Dancre
Posts: 1264
Joined: 4/12/2005
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I guess what I don't get is why it was soooo important to have the party in a CHURCH. Why not a restaurant, or a friend's house? When these women said, no thanks, the girl trotted off to another church, not a house. That's fishy to me. I'm hoping she didn't want the party in the church knowing other women in the church would attend, thus meaning more gifts. If that was her goal, then the women did the right thing. No one should be manipulated by others in that matter. I guess I'm just not understanding why a church?? On the other hand, she could have been harmless and she wanted a big place. I could be wrong in thinking her party was cheesy. Who knows?
I also want to STRESS there are a lot of gaps in this situation in which the OP never shared. We don't know the girl, how she treated others, if she was trying to take advatage of others, etc. I really don't think we should stand up and judge the girl or the women of the church in that neither are here to defend themselves.
kim
quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
Yeah...I wanted to be more clear on whether she wanted to use the building as though it were a "community center" or whether she wanted the women to host a shower for her at the church or whether she wanted the women to have a shower for her anywhere else. I think the women should have helped her get what she needed, but the rest of those little details to make a difference when it comes to using a church building. (IMO)
< Message edited by Dancre -- 10/8/2008 7:53:09 PM >
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 8:10:14 PM
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Kat_D
Posts: 3142
Joined: 9/2/2005
From: Where We Shake, Rattle & Roll!
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quote:
ORIGINAL: scottishmomma46
okay now iam seeing what is going on, and i thank you for explaining it in a very good way. now i can say she might be using the church as a let me see what i can get? so i am understanding that? so in this case she is using the church wrongly. 
That was just an assumption the previous poster made. Imo, had she read the thread through, she would have realized that was not really the case. In actuality, this is what was said in the OP:
quote:
She wanted to have her baby shower at the church.
Some of the women said no way! They were so disapointed in her etc...
He just said she wanted to have the shower at the church facility, not that she was using the church to get the things she and the baby needed. Although I do need to reiterate that it would have been the loving/Christian thing for the women of the church to do...ministering to a pregnant girl's needs...whether the shower was at the church or they helped her in another way at another place.
_____________________________
~Kat
"...And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes...no more death, sorrow, nor crying."
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 8:24:07 PM
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Dancre
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Well, Kat, believe it or not I DID READ the entire thread. And I didn't see where he said 'He just said she wanted to have the shower at the church facility, not that she was using the church to get the things she and the baby needed.' Raft never said that. But he did say she is bi-polar and had other problems. Maybe that turned the women off. Maybe the girl was rude. Again, we don't know. I just find fishy that it had to be a church and after this church said no way, she went to another one.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Kat_D
quote:
ORIGINAL: scottishmomma46
okay now iam seeing what is going on, and i thank you for explaining it in a very good way. now i can say she might be using the church as a let me see what i can get? so i am understanding that? so in this case she is using the church wrongly.
That was just an assumption the previous poster made. Imo, had she read the thread through, she would have realized that was not really the case. In actuality, this is what was said in the OP:
quote:
She wanted to have her baby shower at the church.
Some of the women said no way! They were so disapointed in her etc...
He just said she wanted to have the shower at the church facility, not that she was using the church to get the things she and the baby needed. Although I do need to reiterate that it would have been the loving/Christian thing for the women of the church to do...ministering to a pregnant girl's needs...whether the shower was at the church or they helped her in another way at another place.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 8:29:49 PM
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scottishmomma46
Posts: 178
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well whatever the reason only
God trully knows the true heart of this young girl.
_____________________________
faith is just not something you talk about......faith is something you do.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 9:29:18 PM
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rafterman
Posts: 15
Joined: 9/19/2005
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Well, I met with the girl a few days ago and it does not look like down syndrome will be an issue with the baby.
And, I'm gonna throw this into the mix. Don't know if it would have mattered if I mentioned it earlier.
The church has a child care center/fellowship hall/childrens sunday school area and this is where the baby shower would have been held.
In hindsight I thought are there themes down for a baby shower maybe. A way to have a presentation or a speaker on God's will and plan for babies.
There has to be a way to do a baby shower for a sinner that can bring glory to God.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 9:38:22 PM
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Kat_D
Posts: 3142
Joined: 9/2/2005
From: Where We Shake, Rattle & Roll!
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rafterman
Well, I met with the girl a few days ago and it does not look like down syndrome will be an issue with the baby.
And, I'm gonna throw this into the mix. Don't know if it would have mattered if I mentioned it earlier.
The church has a child care center/fellowship hall/childrens sunday school area and this is where the baby shower would have been held.
In hindsight I thought are there themes down for a baby shower maybe. A way to have a presentation or a speaker on God's will and plan for babies.
There has to be a way to do a baby shower for a sinner that can bring glory to God.
There sure does have to be a way, Rafterman! I can think of several, but this particular girl isn't in my church. I only wish she were.
I am so sorry to hear of the further complication of Downs for the baby. I will continue to pray for the baby's health and that God gives this young mother wisdom and insight so that she is able to do the best for her child.
I'm so glad that you had the opportunity to minister to her again and pray the Lord will provide more opportunities for you to do that. I am sure you have been an example of God's love and concern for her. I am also praying that she comes quickly to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.
Blessings to you, Rafterman.
Edited to fix misspelled word 'cause I'm anal like that.
Edited again because I mis-read you...I thought you said the baby did have Downs, but now in the light of day, I see you said it does not. Sorry about that and praise God!
< Message edited by Kat_D -- 10/9/2008 1:50:08 PM >
_____________________________
~Kat
"...And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes...no more death, sorrow, nor crying."
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/8/2008 10:47:27 PM
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echunt
Posts: 8
Joined: 10/8/2008
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The church missed a HUGE opportunity. I would bet this girl is scared beyond belief and was desperately reaching out for comfort. If that was the case then the church blew it.
You have to catch them before you clean them!
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 3:24:55 AM
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Roberta_
Posts: 6962
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: East Bay Area
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rcjames
We had a wild and wooly thread on this not too long ago.
I do not think the Church property should be used to honor an unrepent unsaved person of any sort.
If someone want to give the girl a shower they should do it at their home or some other place.
Thanks
RC
I agree. There are plenty of ways the church can support her and show her Christ's love without throwing her a shower.
I've only read up to this post, but I wonder.... If she's a long time attender, why is she not saved? Is it because of something the church is or is not teaching? It doesn't sound to me like a baby shower would make that much of a difference.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 9:12:28 AM
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coolfamily6
Posts: 253
Joined: 4/18/2005
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quote:
What makes her attend church? And youth group? For me it was because I was seeking. I attended a church for over a year before I was saved. I liked to be with the "nice" kids at the church and enjoyed the activites. I did not understand how to be "saved" even after weeks of sitting in the pew. Truly, I sat in the pew every week and in SS but during the week I was still lost in my sin.
But they had a revival speaker who laid it out in a way I understood and 20 yrs ago this month I was saved.
PRAISE THE LORD for my salvation!
_____________________________
If your bible is a mess; your life won't be.
~Encouragement a mom gave to our children at our First Grader's Bible Ceremony!
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 10:14:38 AM
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scottishmomma46
Posts: 178
Joined: 4/7/2006
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AMEN
_____________________________
faith is just not something you talk about......faith is something you do.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 1:40:41 PM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4273
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rafterman
Well, I met with the girl a few days ago and it does not look like down syndrome will be an issue with the baby.
You said the mother has some issues...do these issues prevent her from an understanding of salvation? IOW, is the denial of her salvation based on what we think she doesn't understand about it and she is thinking she is actually saved?
Or does she just say No?
Just curious since she's so young and having a down syndrome baby at that age is unusual.
quote:
ORIGINAL: rafterman
There has to be a way to do a baby shower for a sinner that can bring glory to God.
Of course there is. Baby showers give God glory for allowing us the ability to choose life. It's the people involved that tend to dink it up. 
_____________________________
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 1:43:09 PM
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scottishmomma46
Posts: 178
Joined: 4/7/2006
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if she knows right from wrong and is able to know when she does right from wrong then yes, she could understand the subject of salvation.
_____________________________
faith is just not something you talk about......faith is something you do.
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 1:51:25 PM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4273
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
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quote:
ORIGINAL: scottishmomma46
if she knows right from wrong and is able to know when she does right from wrong then yes, she could understand the subject of salvation.
I'm just sayin that I've been around girls who are considered simple-minded or slightly retarded. And while yes, they know right from wrong and imo, are really saved Christians, many other people feel that unless they have their particular theological, doctrinal, and complicated version of the gospel, then their understanding is not complete and they can't possibly be really saved.
This thread shows tons of assumptions based on this girls lack of salvation along with many thoughts or questions about her mental state and the health of her child.
My question just comes from that same cloud of thought.
_____________________________
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RE: unwed, pregnant, teenager - 10/9/2008 1:55:25 PM
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scottishmomma46
Posts: 178
Joined: 4/7/2006
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at the church that we attend there is a down syndrome young lady and i am not sure if they totally understand or not, but i know God made them this way and he knows thier hearts. so i guess we can just be a witness to them and pray that they do understand.
_____________________________
faith is just not something you talk about......faith is something you do.
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