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what about you?

 
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what about you? - 10/8/2008 3:29:21 PM   
shell18_86


Posts: 18
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline
today has been a unusually tough day so i got this idea for a topic that might not only help me but others who feel lonely sometimes.

the question is do you ever have days where you feel as though you will never find the person for you? days where you wonder how you will make it through even though you know god will get you through it? if so, share with us what you do to get through those days.

_____________________________

it is in that moment, when i remember that god loves me and will never leave me, that i am overcome with a sense of peace like i have never felt before and i smile because i know everything will be ok.
Post #: 1
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 3:50:16 PM   
Kellgaste


Posts: 450
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Wyoming
Status: offline
Ah yes...Lonliness, it can be a friend and an enemy at the same time. It can allow you to reflect on things to improve and it can allow you the time to reflect on what you feel you failed at.

What it also does it allows you to reflect on the Lord Jesus Christ .

Now, how do I cope with it, I flip the TV on to the Contemporary Christian Channel and play that as background music, then I clean the house <sigh>, Read, bounce on the computer to go over finances, play chess against myself (Not as easy as it sounds), Meditate on the Lord, stop procrastinating on the yard work I have to do , Pray, Do push-ups/crunches, watch a movie, play Computer........

There is other stuff but maybe that will get you jumpstarted <smile>.

Remember, God is in Control....but you have to let him be, resist the urge to take the reigns out of his hands and let him drive the coach! <smile>.

God Bless my Lady,

-Kell
Post #: 2
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 4:04:49 PM   
Tashilein


Posts: 166
Joined: 9/30/2008
Status: online
I know that feeling.

What I do? Well, on the day-for-which-businesses-want-you-to-buy-their-loveydovey-cute-items-to-skyrocket-their-profits-and-you-to-tell-your-loved-one-how-much-you-love-them (aka Valentine's Day and yes, I'm probably saying that cause there's some jealousy going on ), I just ban anything romantic on tv and go for all action/horror/thriller/whatever-excuses-me-to-hide-behind-a-pillow.

On other days... I feel sorry for myself, sometimes cry or stuff myself with chocolate or whatever craving I have at that time. For a blonde, there's sometimes quite some brain-activity going on then

What else I do, is email a dear friend in the States and tell her about my worries and fears about being lonely and she'll give me the hope and encouragment to trust God and that one day He'll get me in touch with the one I'll grow old with (wheelchair, fake teeth and all incl.) and have a family with. My friend is married and just had her 2nd baby in August, but she tells me about how she dealt with feeling lonely and finding that person and how she kept up her hopes and trusted in God
Post #: 3
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 4:44:51 PM   
raivyne


Posts: 881
Joined: 8/28/2008
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We've all been there Shell! Though the past month and a half have been great for me. It helps to be busy from the time your feet hit the floor in the morning until you lay your head down at night though! Hang in there hun ((shell))

_____________________________

God grades on the cross – not on a curve

Good – God = 0

In the dark? Follow the Son!

The Power of a Simple Gift! samaritanspurse.org
Post #: 4
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 5:14:18 PM   
RubySparkles


Posts: 269
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
The only way I can escape it is to fully immerse myself in an activity. Like last week I was away from home on a fully loaded training course. Those opportunities are few and far between though.

_____________________________

Lord, all our success is because of what you have done, so give us peace.
Is 26:12
Post #: 5
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 8:58:11 PM   
shell18_86


Posts: 18
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline
ravyne..i think you are right about that it helps to have something to do from the time your feet hit the floor...i was down today until i got to church and around others. now i feel tons better.
but you guys all have a ton of good ideas....its nice for people ( not just me ) to see that they are not alone in their feelings of lonliness. i think sometimes people ( especially new christians just learning ) feel as if it is wrong to feel lonely because we have god. so since i was having a tough day i wanted to start something that could also let others know they are not alone. so keep it comming lol..any one else want to share about what they do when feeling lonely?

_____________________________

it is in that moment, when i remember that god loves me and will never leave me, that i am overcome with a sense of peace like i have never felt before and i smile because i know everything will be ok.
Post #: 6
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 9:14:10 PM   
Grace-N-Mercy


Posts: 6133
Joined: 5/2/2005
Status: offline
I do what just about everyone has mentioned so far... I stay busy. I stay up late at night waiting until I can hardly keep my eyes open before I fall asleep. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I call a friend. A lot of times I get on here. I listen to music, go for a ride, eat a container of frosting or ice cream, and sometimes I'll go for a walk. Oh, and I also immerse myself in work.
Post #: 7
RE: what about you? - 10/8/2008 9:24:20 PM   
song


Posts: 253
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Southern Florida
Status: offline
I usually journal about my feelings and then make myself remember how blessed I am. That I have a wonderful fulfilling steady job. A safe place to live and food to eat. And that even if what I think would be perfect for me never happens, I know that God's perfect is happening every day.

I am a small minded human with blinders on. But if I ask God to tell me about what all there really is to see he is very happy to answer.

_____________________________

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. ~ 1 John
Post #: 8
RE: what about you? - 10/9/2008 5:48:03 PM   
Prairiehiker


Posts: 2586
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
quote:

the question is do you ever have days where you feel as though you will never find the person for you? days where you wonder how you will make it through even though you know God will get you through it? if so, share with us what you do to get through those days.


Here's how I deal with it. THis has helped me through the past few days in dealing with a difficult loss. I simply acknowledge that I'm not omniscient, and accept that I DON'T KNOW. I don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow. I don't even know what's gonna happen in an hour. Though I can reasonably assume how my day will unfold, I'm learning to leave room for God to do His will in my life. Saying "I don't know" why things are the way they are or how things are going to be tomorrow takes away a lot of the fear of the negative expectations I have and gets me ready to face the day with a lot of hope.

Then,I go about my days. If it means I have to go for a long run to get rid of all my anxiety, then, I do that. If it means I have to read a book, clean the closet, call a friend, etc, then, I do that, not knowing how things will unfold, but knowing that God, with His omniscience already knows and has already taken care of it, and He will reveal to me His plans in His time.

Does that help?

_____________________________

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder
Thy power through out the universe displayed

How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
Post #: 9
RE: what about you? - 10/9/2008 6:20:27 PM   
JustJeannie


Posts: 4544
Joined: 6/14/2007
From: the state of confusion
Status: offline
These are all great answers. I think I needed this one! Thanks for the thread Shell!! and (((Shell)))

_____________________________

Jeannie
Post #: 10
RE: what about you? - 10/9/2008 10:24:00 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


Posts: 2104
Joined: 11/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker

quote:

the question is do you ever have days where you feel as though you will never find the person for you? days where you wonder how you will make it through even though you know God will get you through it? if so, share with us what you do to get through those days.


Here's how I deal with it. THis has helped me through the past few days in dealing with a difficult loss. I simply acknowledge that I'm not omniscient, and accept that I DON'T KNOW. I don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow. I don't even know what's gonna happen in an hour. Though I can reasonably assume how my day will unfold, I'm learning to leave room for God to do His will in my life. Saying "I don't know" why things are the way they are or how things are going to be tomorrow takes away a lot of the fear of the negative expectations I have and gets me ready to face the day with a lot of hope.

Then,I go about my days. If it means I have to go for a long run to get rid of all my anxiety, then, I do that. If it means I have to read a book, clean the closet, call a friend, etc, then, I do that, not knowing how things will unfold, but knowing that God, with His omniscience already knows and has already taken care of it, and He will reveal to me His plans in His time.

Does that help?


This sounds like me. If I keep this perspective, it really helps. Sometimes I can't manage to keep it...and what's cool about that is that God says His grace is sufficient even for that.

Today a couple of interesting things happened to me. I was getting information for GP1 on a wedding venue. The secretary asked if it was me getting married and I said that while I wished God would bless me like that, He hadn't. She said she was in the same situation...her husband had died at age 33 and she was still single...I would guess that would make her single longer than me, just by looking at her.

Anyway, that was discouraging. Then I found out that an acquaintance whose marriage I thought was solid got divorced this summer...apparently the fellow I thought was a nice, solid guy was somehow really a bum, jerk or pervert.

THAT was discouraging, too.

Then I got to thinking about rgod's link that she posted over in the Hope Deferred thread.

Maybe it would be easier (and perhaps even more scriptural!) to quit living in the "ambiguous loss" place, and just go ahead and DECIDE to BE SINGLE for the rest of my life.

It won't keep me from getting married if the opportunity arises. But it might give me some peace and wisdom until that happens. It gives me some "control" over the situation...it's not GOD who is MAKING me be single...it's me CHOOSING to be single.

I don't know. It's some weird mental gymnastics, in a way. But I wonder if the pain level would go down...and scripture says we are to live in the moment, right?

Does that make sense to anybody?

shallbe
Post #: 11
RE: what about you? - 10/10/2008 5:21:39 AM   
ebony101


Posts: 934
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: the big blue marble
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL:ShallBeRebuilt
Maybe it would be easier (and perhaps even more scriptural!) to quit living in the "ambiguous loss" place, and just go ahead and DECIDE to BE SINGLE for the rest of my life.


I was contentedly in that SINGLES place, but God poked me out .

_____________________________

'We're writing a gospel, a chapter each day,
By the things that we do & the words that we say.'
Post #: 12
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